I could really do with some advice and words of wisdom

[Grace8785564]

Guys I really need advice. This is going to be long so apologies in advance.
My partner had a drink and drug problem from a young age I used to gout with him and lit with anxiety that he done something stupid, he would always start fights and fight with me etc etc a messy drunk,
Then he started taking weed and he took that for almost 10 years. We broke a year ago and got back together In January when he finished rehab, he is now 8 months clean.
He has a very controlling personality, he is always asking about the men that are liking my pics on insta and saying “we’re you with Him when we broke up” “are you seeing him” we have a daughter and I literally do everything with her, he never takes her for an hour or two on his own to give me a break.
He cheated on me numerous times in the past but blamed it on his alcohol.
I am severely depressed and he dosent care, first I thought it was because he didn’t know much about it but he does because he went through it himself i solely think he just dosent care.
When we broke up he begged and begged me “please get back with I will go to rehab” which he did and I’m giving him a chance but nothing has changed apart from the fact he’s sober and clean.
He doesn’t even go to his AA meetings? (He’s not drinking or drugging)
I could really do with some advice

Leave.

You will be so much better and happier without this dickhead. There is literally nothing positive he brings to your life.

Leave and don't wreck your daughter's life by taking this prick back.

You need to run and don’t look back

Leave, never take him back. This is not the life you want for your child.

Recently I was thinking of making him go to a phycologist because I honestly think he has some kind of personality disorder, he gets angry so easily all the time and is always negative and acting like everyone is out to get him.

Get rid of him permanently. That's the only advice you need. He will never change.

So you can see that even without the drink and drugs he is a truly obnoxious human being.
You do not need advice. You need to put your child first and get rid of this excuse for a man.
You deserve better.
Even alone you will be better off, as you will have control of your life.
Oh and don't fall for the blackmail of how he can't stay sober and clean without you and he will fall off the wagon.... NOBODY gets sober and/or clean for anyone else.. you do it for yourself...
Let him get on with his life and you get on being the best Mum you can be!

Leave him permanently.

He is not your project to fix. The only person you can change is yourself. Start by exiting this toxic mess.

You can't make someone go and see a psychologist or engage with therapy or any other intervention.

Maybe go and see one yourself to unpack your beliefs about relationships and why your unable to exit such a dysfunctional one, but that's the only place a psychologist should have in this scenario.

I'm sure he does have a personality disorder: psychopathy. Or similar. Theres no fixing that shit.

Get out. Get therapy for yourself.

Your daughter deserves better than this.

Put your child first by leaving this man and not taking him back.

It's unthinkable to stay with him and show your daughter that this is how women deserve to be treated.

You have a choice, she doesn't.

Stop trying to figure out why he is this way or how to fix him and start trying to figure out how to leave him and then once you're out invest in some therapy to stop you going back to him or having another abusive relationship.

For your daughter.

How many threads have I read recently about women with utter waste of space abusers and she’s trying to figure them out??
Ffs get rid, stop wasting your life with a man who gives zero fucks about you.

You cannot save another person. He needs to save himself.

You need to focus on saving yourself and your child. Immediately.

Get as far away from him as you can.

Leave him.

You can't fix him. I would also suspect he contributes to you feeling depressed. Leave him.

Nothing to add but your duty is to your daughter. He'll be an abusive, controlling prick drunk or sober. That's who he is

@HerMammy

How many threads have I read recently about women with utter waste of space abusers and she’s trying to figure them out?? Ffs get rid, stop wasting your life with a man who gives zero fucks about you.

Legion!

They and most of all their children deserve so much more.