Hand hold please :(

[Twinsizedmattresss]

I feel dreadful, I've been with my dp for 6 years and we have 2 children. Last night he did something that kind of tipped the scales and I told him I had enough and it was over. In my heart I know it's the right idea but I feel horrible. I've cried 4 times today and I just want to say sorry and give him a hug. I feel like my heart is broken and I dont know what to do. We have to live together for at least another month

Oh no, sorry to hear you’re so upset. Is there any way you overreacted to what he did? Given that you want to say sorry and give him a hug? Is what he did forgivable? Maybe re evaluate what he did and if it really is unforgivable. Huge hugs

Hand here for you.

You know it’s the right thing and therefore you need to go through with this. I know it’s hard. It’s natural to grieve a relationship, and it’s perfectly valid to be hurting too.

It will get better.

What did he do?
In any event notwithstanding the issue if he has crossed a line he’s crossed a line
You are entitled to boundaries, children and history together or not.

Doing the right thing isn't always easy but it sounds like you know in your gut that you've made the right choice here.

The end of a relationship is always sad. But you have to make the choices that allow you to respect yourself and find happiness moving forwards. Flogging a dead horse will get you nowhere.

@Niceeyes were looking after his little sisters for a week. I asked him not to go out for drinks with his friends as I have to look after 4 children on my own. He went anyway and I asked him not to get drunk as we are going to the cinema the next day and I cant take them all on my own. I got a phone call at midnight that he was vomiting and unconscious and no taxi would accept him. I had to phone my dad to come and pick him up. Theres been lots of similar incidents, not drinking wise but mostly him just saying a metaphorical fuck you to helping me in anyway

My children are going to be so confused and I dont even know where to start with anything. Itd be so easy to just say sorry and go back to normal but I'm just waiting for the next thing at this point and I feel angry

He’s a twat
And if you’ve been here too many times in terms of his refusal to step up and be a parent already then I absolutely understand why this was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

You’d be better off on your own at least then you won’t be disappointed, mucked about and exploited

He's a fucking dick basically then.

Also it was HIS little sisters?! It wasn't his job to help, it was his responsibility to be the carer. He fobbed it off on you. And as you said, gave you a metaphorical 'fuck you' into the bargain.

Get rid, 100%. Don't fall for any of the crocodile tears or manipulations even he realises you are serious either. People who treat you with contempt like he has, dont belong in our lives. In any capacity. Let alone as a partner.

@umberellatheweatha I think you've hit the nail on the head. His sisters weren't even supposed to stay for the 9 days that they are. I agreed to 3 days as our house is tiny and I have 2 children but he agreed to 9 days behind my back and booked off no annual leave like i asked him to. It's always incidents like that and if I am upset he tells me I am crazy. This was the last incident 4 days ago

Ugh, sounds draining. If you are doing it all on your own anyway then maybe you won’t miss the ‘help’ .....he sounds a bit childish, but also he may have a drinking problem and needs help, hard one to call without knowing him. You’ll know I’m your heart the right decision, as hard as it is now, you don’t sound happy with him abs deserve someone who will appreciate you. Dry those tears, get a cup of tea and call a trustworthy real life friend and ask their advice, they may understand your relationship better xxxxxx

Ick. He is vile. Not a shred of kindness or moral fibre in him. A gas lighter into the bargain.

You matter op. Your needs matter. And anyone who loves you would treat you with that in mind. He never will. Because he is just...empty. And nothing you do can ever change that.

You just gotta choose to love yourself op.
And show your kids that a person should never stay and just accept being treated like they don't matter by a partner. Let alone being treated so cruelly into the bargain.

Onwards and upwards! Hope you can you turf the git out asap!

@Umberellatheweatha thankyou, I know it's the best thing to do. Hes been nice as pie all day asking If I need anything but I know itll just happen again. I'm just so emotional and exhausted. I ended up going to bed at 3am after that whole fiasco and getting up a 5am when a bird managed to get trapped in the loft somehow (probably a sign haha)