As per the title. I am NC with my parents for many years, on and off. NC the last few years as they were unsupportive and downright malicious while I was going through a divorce. I have been to therapy on and off and was formally diagnosed with complex PTSD.
I had mostly gotten my parents out of my head over the last couple years as though they live nearby they had left me alone.
Until I got a phone call from my father saying he was dying and would I come see him before he died. I was actually undergoing cancer treatment at the time, about two months ago (luckily cancer now cured). I rushed over to see him, thinking I would feel really bad if I did not and he said he was on death's door.
Well, he was able to open the actual door and everything. Although he has had quite bad health (in the last few years he's had quadruple bypass, kidney transplant, colon tumour removal, diabetes, etc, etc, and now parkinsons) but with all the medical interventions he could hang on for a while I think. He also has my mother waiting on him hand and foot as well.
During the meeting he said he was so happy to see me, etc, did I forgive him, etc. I said I forgave and didn't care anymore to be kind. I don't really forgive or feel that way but I made the words. So here I was, going through cancer treatment completely alone, having to console my father who told me I was dead to him previously.
He then said he would write my back into his will!!! When I last had dealings with my parents they said I would be out of their will because I am such a bad person. And they did it. I can't say I was surprised. I mentally erased that potential wind fall from my mind long ago.
I am left feeling disappointed, though, because they knew what my husband did to me, that I was a single parent with a handicapped son, and they still wrote me out. Out of spite.
I don't think I would ever do that to my own children. They would have to turn into murderer or something for me to do that. My brother, meanwhile, never left home, has a criminal record, is the golden child.
I am not sure why I am posting this. I think I had gotten past everything and let it go and then I got the phone call. I just feel like I was used in some way. I feel bereft of love from them all over again. I just want them to leave me alone. I don't care about money --- loving a person doesn't me you dangle an inheritance over their head so long as they behave how you like... I don't think I will go over again should I ever get another call....
Sorry this was long....