Boyfriend

[Omalley132]

Hi, my boyfriends replies keep getting worse when responding to messages. I understand we can’t talk 24/7 but when I can see that he’s read my message and leaves it hours to come back with the same excuse of “sorry I forgot to press send” it’s getting boring and annoying. We spoke about it and he apologised, but it’s worrying me that he’s going off me or getting bored. Our sexual activity has been on a decrease also. Just don’t know what to do and thinking the worst

Do you live together? If not are you still seeing as much of him as you did before?

We live together now. It seems great when we are together, face to face, apart from sexually, he tells me how much he loves me all the time etc. It’s just so strange and that’s why I’m so confused.

If you live together surely you see plenty of each other? do you need to be messaging/txting all day too?
Are you quite young?

Maybe he cba texting for the sake of it. I don’t either. My dh and I have endured 23 years together without texting each other through the day.

I’m 21, he’s 27. Yeah true I understand that it’s just the fact he’s opening my messages and leaving me on read.

If he's 27 and the relationship hasn't been going on for that long and he's not wanting sex, I'd wonder what was going on, tbh.

What are your messages? Do they all require replies? I’d be annoyed if he was ignoring messages with direct questions in, but otherwise if you live together surely there’s no need to be texting much on top of that.

Again; you live together, how much talking is needed? is this whilst you’re at work/uni?
Tbh I’d call it a day, you’re 21 no need to put up with shit sex or shit bf if that’s how you feel.

Yep...he thinks, I cba replying to that just now. I’ll see her later.
Some people aren’t that texty.

Yeah that’s my concerns, we are young. I do understand we don’t need to text all day, everyday but I still don’t like to be ignored. Doesn’t help that I feel he isn’t being very affectionate in the bed either. We used to have quite a lot of sex and it’s decreased quite dramatically.

If he's not prepared to do anything about affection and sex, then you really have to consider whether you want to stay with someone and have a sex-free life from the age of 21!

Okay if everyone is just focusing on the texts. I would usually be fine with the bad texting side but it’s the fact I feel like he’s being less sexual with me also. I’m combining things that I’m seeing changing and getting worried because yes I love him dearly and he tells me he loves me but I don’t feel very loved or special.

Yeah true! Thankyou, we still do have sex but now it’s just like for him and not me. Like once he’s finished, it’s finished which feels horrible.

@Omalley132

Yeah true! Thankyou, we still do have sex but now it’s just like for him and not me. Like once he’s finished, it’s finished which feels horrible.

Please bin him. This is not what love, sex, relationships are meant to be about. If he doesn't care about your sexual pleasure, what else about you does he not care about? Don't get stuck with him. You're so young and will find someone so much better

This might be a bit too much info, but we have been together over a year and he’s only went down on me a hand full of times. Without sounding full of myself also, there is nothing wrong with me at all for him to not want too. It’s just like sex is him based. He also doesn’t initiate dates, affection wise it’s really just sexually😂 that probably sounds like I’m being stupid now if it’s only sexually but sexual interaction is a big thing for me.

It’s kind of like he sees me as only a best friend now, he doesn’t flirt or if he does flirt. It’s all talk and he doesn’t go with it.

Long story short thou, he used to make me feel irresistible and now it’s like he doesn’t even think about touching me.

Why do you want to stay in a relationship where you feel sex is done to you, not with you?

Why do you want to stay in a relationship with a man who isn't affectionate and only touches you when he wants to sleep with you?

Why do you want to stay in a relationship with a man you aren't actually happy with?

Reading your updates, it sounds like now you’re living together he doesn’t feel he has to make any effort.
At 21 don’t put up with this, move out and move on.

Maybe he made a lot of effort at first but fundimentaly it was a bit of an act and now he's living with you, this is the real domestic, unexiting him.

Time to leave, this has run its course. If you tell him you have had enough as you are not happy anymore, you have nothing to lose. Worst is, he will agree, in which case you know where you stand. But he might get a dose of reality - I doubt it.
Doesn't sound like he has a healthy respect for women or you, given that he doesn't care about pleasing you or answering your texts.

Leave him. You're young with no reason to stay together. Plenty more men out there to discover!

@Xoxoxoxoxoxox

Maybe he made a lot of effort at first but fundimentaly it was a bit of an act and now he's living with you, this is the real domestic, unexiting him.

I think this essentially nails it.