Do I love him too much? Is this healthy?

[WonderWoooals]

For context, I have a busy job and see friends regularly. I have hobbies and interests. I go away without DP.

But I love him so much that sometimes it actually scares me. I can’t imagine being without him. I will be in the car or in the shop and suddenly I feel this huge wave of love for him out of nowhere.

It is the best relationship I’ve ever had but should I really be in fear like this?! Is this normal?

Nah that’s gorgeous. Embrace it, enjoy it, soak it all up. In years to come it will be replaced by a much more gentle, cosier sort of love, and you’ll really miss that all encompassing, stomach dropping, fanny fluttering kind of love

@ShirleyPhallus the stomach dropping has gone a bit but it’s just this feeling in my chest like oh my god I love you so so much it hurts.

I can be pretty icy when I need to be so this is very overwhelming for me

Is it reciprocated?

If so, yes, go with it!

@spotcheck I think so. Maybe not the same extent as I can’t imagine feeling even more than I already do?

It is the best relationship I’ve ever had but should I really be in fear like this?! Is this normal?

What is the fear?

I felt this way about an ex. I honestly thought I’d myself if he left me... well be left me and I’m still here lol. I think it just means they’re the love of your life. I don’t feel that way about my current partner and I think it’s just me protecting myself but sometimes I wish I did get those feelings, it’s a pretty amazing feeling so enjoy it and try not to stress about it.

I feel like this too. I know what you mean.

I still have this with my DH. We plod along quite normally for weeks then all of a sudden I just get this overwhelming feeling of love. It's quite funny because we often get it at the same time. We could be stood in the kitchen just cooking dinner on a Wednesday night then suddenly have this overwhelming urge to hug each other as hard as possible. It's a lovely feeling, just enjoy it.

What's important is that you don't let this lust (which is what this is) in anyway blind you to any subtle bad behaviour from him. These feelings you have may persist, or they may pass in time like it does for a lot of people.These feelings don't necessarily mean that you're compatible with him in all the important ways and that's what you need to take time to discern.

These are hormones, so yes enjoy them while they last, but real love is something much deeper. Love is a choice and actively willing the good of the other person even if you might not be feeling the floaty butterflies that make YOU feel good. It's very easy to be lustful and dreamy when the relationship is easy. You won't know whether he truly loves you until there comes a time he has to self sacrifice for you in a significant way for your greater good.
No human being is perfect so it's unhealthy to put anyone on a pedestal.

I feel this sometimes and we’ve been together 13 years. It’s deep love and it feels great. Just enjoy it and think how lucky you are xx

Still have those feelings 53 years on.

I've been married 20 years and have never felt that, what you have is so so special, enjoy.

My 20 years is lovely but very plod and comfy not that feeling you have.

I have this with dh of 11 years. It's not just last. It's love and I hope it lasts for you

How long have you been together OP?

*lust

How long have you been together? I felt exactly like that for the first 3 years or so. I still love him but I guess having a baby (now toddler) with no available childcare changed the dynamic of our relationship and we're probably too exhausted to have the headspace for all that! Maybe it will come back when the DC are older.