Was I in the wrong?

[onlygoingup]

I split up with exP last year during lock down, it been coming for a while but one weekend it came to ahead, no abuse or anything. We'd been together 10 years.
We'd both been talking recently about possibly trying again but had been difficult to actually get time together due to him working away and he seemed hot and cold. All I asked was that he honest with me if there was anyone else on the scene.
I've had a feeling that he was seeing someone else while telling me that we'd be getting back together. This weekend he didn't have DC and said he had to work, now I'm 99% sure he didn't have work and had a weekend away with someone else. I messaged him this morning and basically said to him that I knew he wasn't alone, no reply.
When he's got back this way this afternoon he called to see if he could come see the DC. I asked if it could wait until next weekend as I didn't want to see him. He's denied being with anyone else and made out I was just being paranoid. We ended up having a bit of an argument on the phone and he accused me of stopping him from seeing the DC, which I haven't I just didn't want him coming here with stuff for the DC from a weekend away with OW.
He's now blocked me on all social media completely, so I know he's angry with me. Now I'm starting to have doubts as to if I did the right thing to ask him not to come, I've spent years keeping quiet when unhappy about something just so he wouldn't be annoyed. I've messaged him to say I wouldn't ever stop contact but I just didn't want to see him today. I full of doubt now about it all and worried I've made everything difficult for me and the DC.

I saw my kids at their dads this morning because I wanted to show them the car I was test driving (they are car mad!) I rang first and asked their dad if it was ok, and he said yes.
If he had said no then fine, but we both knew it was in the kids best interests rather than ours (although he did come out and look at it too!). We are amicable but the point is, it was a nice thing to do. If he had gifts for your kids, why not let them have them?

@Lillygolightly

I agree with this.

There is clearly some manipulation going on here still. He had no intention of coming that weekend, he told op he was working. His motives for coming round were not just to give the children some stuff.

He's still trying to hoover you up, was on the way to succeeding and you called him out on his behaviour.

Op he hasn't changed his ways, don't consider getting back with him, you are worth more.
Men like this don't ever want you to move on.

@Onthedunes Thanks, your last line especially. He talked about us getting back together after he found me OLD.

Your right, I need to give up the idea that things could be good again. I did let my emotions get to me this weekend and knew I'd break if I saw him. I really didn't do it to punish him or the kids.

@onlygoingup

He knew you’d break if you saw him too, it’s exactly why he wanted to come round.

What is all the nonsense about stopping him from seeing his kids if he wants to see kids at 1 am, does OP have to get out of bed and wake the kids so that the man can see his kids .

I don't think you did any wrong OP. It's was not convenient for you, so you rescheduled to a more convenient time. Why does he get to cancel his weekend with his kids but you always have to be available.

@Dotell

What is all the nonsense about stopping him from seeing his kids if he wants to see kids at 1 am, does OP have to get out of bed and wake the kids so that the man can see his kids . I don't think you did any wrong OP. It's was not convenient for you, so you rescheduled to a more convenient time. Why does he get to cancel his weekend with his kids but you always have to be available.

Was it 1am ???