Changed mind about OLD, WWYD?

[toucancancan]

I had planned to go on a date with someone id been talking to OLD. He'd booked the table and we were having good typed chat. When we actually spoke on the phone I was a bit short as I'd had a bad day and I didn't feel there was a connection so told him so and that i didn't think we should meet up. That was it and he cancelled the date and unmatched me. I've since regretted it and wish I hadn't been such an arse as we have so much in common and he's my type to look at. He's since come up on another dating app I'm on. I'd like to message him but think it's not going to be received well. Don't know what to do, should I message him?

Nah leave it!

No, if were him I would rather not hear from you.

I’d say leave it - you couldnt have felt much of a connection otherwise you would have been pleased to meet up.

Thanks, I've lost my sense of judgement having spent the last year on my own.

Well you don't have anything to lose really..message him and apologise

Yeah, I did already do that the day after the phone call and then I was having a freak out and blocked his number so I've no idea if he replied.

You've acted a bit weirdly but really, what have you got to lose? I'd message him, say sorry for the way you acted, and see what he says. Why not.

Are u ready to date ? Iv been like this before and looking back I just wasn’t that bothered as wasn’t ready to date !

Well you’re going to look insane if you apologised, then blocked him then messaged again, honestly if it was a bloke who done this no one would be advising him to message again because he has “nothing to lose” honestly let this one go!

You felt bad so you apologised, but then you got scared again so you blocked him?
It sounds like you are perhaps not ready for OLD at the moment. But I wouldn’t contact him again, poor guy has been messed around enough

Yeah I am ready now, it's just taken me about a month of agreeing to go on dates and then changing my mind. It's down to feeling quite wierd and not myself after a year in lockdown being mainly on my own

You're right, I'm going to step away from this one now. Thanks for your advice!

Stop being so cavalier with people. If you have spent a month arranging dates and cancelling them you’re not ready to date.

Take some time out until you feel 100% sure you want to meet someone. It’s not fair to mess people around like that.

There's no point - you were very rude so why on earth would he want to hear from you!!?

Like I say, I've taken you're advice on board. Thanks everyone

Sorry but I think people have been a bit tough on you here OP, and I don't have a habit of thinking that!
We have had A year of no other, which has absolutely played tricks with us all, mental health wise.
So you've freaked out a couple of times? At least you cna acknowledge your behaviour and recognise it. Some folk I know still can't manage that.
What have you got to lose? He might not reply? No different a situation than you're in now.
To me, if I received a heartfelt apology and explanation of head fuckery, I'd give kudos for the honesty and more than likely, give it a try.
Nobodys perfect, and everyone fucks up. It's how they behave afterwards that's the important thing and you can demonstrate that.
And hey, at least you'll know one way or the other, and not just have a ' what if'.
Good luck

I would leave it, your first judgment is the best, if you didn't feel the connection then, chances are you still wouldn't plus it's too confusing for him.