Relentless bullying from ex

[MooseOfWallStreet]

Oh where to start- my ex was very abusive, now that we are divorced, he uses his rare time with the kids to concoct an emergency to have me on a string. I am not allowed a moments peace.
He relentlessly texts and calls and threatens and is aggressive.
I'm beyond weary from it all, does anybody know if there's something I can do? He has already been spoken to by the police for his aggression. He just won't leave me alone. Help me, please.

The police need to prosecute him for harassment.

Thank you for responding. I will look into that. I can't believe it has come to this. He has lost all perspective.

Speak to a solicitor about a non-molestation order or something.

Maybe get another phone number, and move all your contacts to the new number, except for him. Then you can switch off or choose when to have him able to get through to you.

Keep all his abusive messages.

If he starts threatening you or abusing you verbally over the phone, end the call. Or put the phone down on the side and walk away from it. Or say "I'm recording this call now" and do it.

A friend recorded her husband. Keep a log, record, build the picture, provide the evidence. Write everything down, date, time, sign.

Thank you all. It's just so stressful and there's no escape, there's always something. I'll start doing that, thank you

You can apply for a non mol yourself here: www.gov.uk/injunction-domestic-violence/eligibility-non-molestation or contact the NCDV who can advise you on it and help you with it for free: www.ncdv.org.uk/non-molestation-order/#:~:text=A%20non%2Dmolestation%20order%20is,attending%20your%20place%20of%20work.

As above, keep a log of everything: emails/calls/texts/visits

Date Time Behaviour How it made you feel Evidence/Witnesses

Download the Brightsky app: www.hestia.org/brightsky You can keep a journal on that and record

Change your number and get a new SIM. Don't tell him your new number and put in your old SIIM only for his messages/calls

Once an abuser knows they are losing control, they tend to amp up the abuse so be prepared for him to come over. Get yourself a doorbell with recording such as Eufy: uk.eufylife.com/collections/video-doorbell This doorbell doesn't need a subscription and records video for you.

If he comes over dial 999 Keep all your police phone call references and crime numbers, add them to your log

Other useful numbers: National Stalking Helpline: www.suzylamplugh.org/pages/category/national-stalking-helpline

Contact 101 and speak to the police about the harassment. They will advise you on what to do and it's a chain of evidence. You're looking to build evidence against him.

Agree with the others report for harrassment.

Thank you, that's great advice and really helpful x

Once you have the non molestation order in place you can go to the family court (no mediation needed where there is domestic abuse) and get contact court ordered and if these "emergencies"keep happening push for contact in a contact centre where it is safer if he seems unable to supervise them or care for them properly. Basically he is using your DC as a means of abusing you so family court will be likely