Right, it's just me and the cats ...

[Sandra15]

Joined this board about a month ago to talk about issues with a friend but have been drawn into chats about online dating, shared some terrible messages a bloke sent to me last year and how I was ghosted, read so many posts from married contributors about abusive violent husbands, cheaters and filming them naked without consent, not to mention the jackasses many of the contributors are writing about with regard to OLD.

I was in a long term relationship for years, and it ended simply because I didn't have the right sort of feelings for him anymore and knew I couldn't marry him because I didn't feel 'that way' even though he's a good friend. He's a mix of family member, good friend and older brother.

But I don't want to wade through treacle of crap only to end up with nutters who abuse and cheat.

So I think I will be a crazy cat lady.

In my opinion being single is as valid a choice as being in a relationship. You shouldn’t feel incomplete if you are not part pf a couple. However, don’t let the stuff on the relationship board color your opinion of relationships in general. There are many happy relationships and many great men put there. People in happy relationships don’t post asking for advice so you would get a skewed view

My boys approve

I'm in the same boat as you, dreadful experiences with men so far and some of the stories you read here are so sad. I feel liberated as I'm choosing to stay single and intend to spend this summer wafting about in my most hippiest of dresses and my hair in braids. I look faintly ridiculous but who cares! I can please myself now!

My cat is so much better company that any of the wankers I've dated or been married too.
I'm an ageing hippy with pink hair and love kaftans and my kitty. I'm happier than I've been in years.

@AnaViaSalamanca

In my opinion being single is as valid a choice as being in a relationship. You shouldn’t feel incomplete if you are not part pf a couple. However, don’t let the stuff on the relationship board color your opinion of relationships in general. There are many happy relationships and many great men put there. People in happy relationships don’t post asking for advice so you would get a skewed view

Where are they? I've never managed to find one.

Welcome to the club! I have 4, they beat any man hands down

I'll be the dog lady equivalent 🙋🏻‍♀️

I have cats (& a dog) and have been happily single for years.
Dipped my toe in the shark infested waters of OLD during last year (I know - but I was bored!) and actually met some really nice/interesting guys.
A couple I'm still seeing and a few months in, they are still not showing any red flags.

I have to say I'm astonished and I never thought I would meet any nice guys who company I enjoy and I have a sexual attraction to (I'm still not really looking for a LTR).
I would say it's just a matter of chance but I'm glad I bothered, and even if ultimately I do end up with just my pets, I still feel it's a worth a punt?
Just stop when you don't enjoy it any longer.

Also a dog version. I'm happy on my own and having a dog to share my life is great. I genuinely am much happier just us two than I ever was in a relationship. Also agree all the men on OLD are awful. Who has the patience.

@saltychoc

I have cats (& a dog) and have been happily single for years. Dipped my toe in the shark infested waters of OLD during last year (I know - but I was bored!) and actually met some really nice/interesting guys. A couple I'm still seeing and a few months in, they are still not showing any red flags.

I have to say I'm astonished and I never thought I would meet any nice guys who company I enjoy and I have a sexual attraction to (I'm still not really looking for a LTR).
I would say it's just a matter of chance but I'm glad I bothered, and even if ultimately I do end up with just my pets, I still feel it's a worth a punt?
Just stop when you don't enjoy it any longer.

That's a good story! I didn't actually do online dating, but I 'met' a guy through a work project last summer who told me he had feelings for me, then he started sending me X rated messages and stood me up!

I agree there are good ones out there, I’ve got one and I’ve never been this happy. But nobody wants to read about that, and it would make me a bit of a dick to wax lyrical about him all over the place!

I was single for about 4 years before him, and genuinely loved it. You don’t need a partner to complete you. You are a whole, fabulous, and fascinating person just as you are. The cats would agree I’m sure!