Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

Original poster

Sex after stitches

7 replies

EmmaCC88 · 02/05/2021 09:21

Hi all, bit of a sensitive topic but I need some advise!

I had my first baby nearly 6 months ago and despite a very normal delivery I did have some grade 2 stitches (both sides). Things haven’t felt the same since and I thought to a certain extent that was normal.

However, my husband and I tried to have sex last night and even just inserting it tears me. It’s painful to the point of tears so full sex is just off the table. That’s not normal right?!

Anyway I’m not sure what to do about it. Could a doctor even help? I’ve tried to look and it just seems to have been stitched a tiny bit asymmetrically, so any pressure just rips me :’( it’s MASSIVELY knocking my confidence.

Has anyone else experienced this?

TIA! X

OP posts:

snapple21 · 02/05/2021 09:22

Are you breastfeeding? That can make you dry down below. So a lot of lubrication is required.

takethegirl · 02/05/2021 09:24

It's not normal for sex to be painful after having a baby and stitches
Please go see your GP x

Bagelsandbrie · 02/05/2021 09:40

See your GP. You may have scarring or have been stitched too tightly (I had this and had to have a small op to correct it and remove keloid scarring). Lots of lube and exploring yourself with no partner pressure can also help.

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 02/05/2021 09:50

Were you using lube? If not - get some!

It sounds like you need to ease back into penetrative sex slowly and gently. If you've not had PIV for 6 months then you definitely need to warm up!

I would try with lots of lube and just one finger for at LEAST the next 5 sessions, along with lots of mutual oral of course. Then move onto 2 fingers, then depending on the size of his package, either a small dildo then his cock, or just jump straight to his cock if (thank the gods) he's not overly-large.

If it's still painful with lots of lube and just one finger then definitely seek medical help.

tiredybear · 02/05/2021 10:09

I had a shit ton of stitches after a horrendous forceps delivery. It took nearly 10 months before I could have PIV sex again.

Yes, a doctor CAN help. Definitely get checked out by your doctor to make sure it's all healing ok then take it slow as PP have advised.

I got referred to a gyno as I still had occasional bleeding from just walking about! They monitored the healing and gave me some gel to apply that helped.

It did still feel a bit painful at first for the first few times we did it, but then everything settled down, and tbh, sex has actually felt better since!

Original poster

EmmaCC88 · 02/05/2021 15:19

Hi ladies,

Thank you all so much for your advice, it really means a lot. I’m going to try to get an appointment with my GP to talk about it but will also buy lots of lube and experiment a bit myself while I wait for the appointment to come round.

Thanks so much, I feel a lot better about things

OP posts:

mistermagpie · 02/05/2021 16:06

I had this after an episiotomy with my first baby. I saw a gynae and he suggested the small op that a pp mentioned because I had scar tissue and had been stitched too tightly at the opening. I got pregnant again before I had it though and then again, which to a certain extent resolved the problem because those births stretched the scar tissue out (fun...).

But yes, definitely see the GP and push for a referral, there will be a solution.

Flip