My bil has been married 3 times. The latest sil and he have been married for 10 years now, no dc from this marriage or the previous one.
When he met this sil he suddenly disappeared, never let anyone know where he was or that he had decided to move in with his new girlfriend, in the other end of the country.
Felt very sorry for his second wife as she knew nothing at all about his new girlfriend and was completely blind sided by it all.
Anyway, bil divorced his 2nd wife and moved permanently 400 miles away.
Never saw him or heard from him for quite a long time, until he decided to invite us to his wedding. The only reason he invited us was so that we could bring his mum to the wedding as she’s unable to travel there.
We didn’t really want to go to the wedding but we’re put under a lot of pressure to take my mil to the wedding, so we did.
Mil really wants everyone to play happy families and to encourage bil and sil to visit us when they come to visit mil. We have tried to build a relationship of sorts with bil and his wife, they have now moved back to this area once mil died and have built a relationship with his 2 children from his first wife, which is good for his kids and the grandchildren.
Sil obviously didn’t know anyone from this area, and some of bil’s previous friends haven’t accepted their marriage, probably due to the way he left his wife. Bil lost a lot of friends.
I have tried to be friendly and supportive and introduced sil to my friends, invited her to outings and dinners etc. as well as other family events.
Recently they have decided to not really bother with us, always messaging to say let’s meet up for a walk or an outside takeaway coffee, then either cancelling at the last minute or saying they’re too busy, but then posting on social media pictures of other people they have been out having a walk or coffee with.
I feel quite used and upset by how I feel about it all now.
I have really tried to be a supportive sil to them and include them in family and friends, now I feel so foolish and hurt by their manner towards us and don’t know what to do.
Sorry this is so long.