Pregnant and certain my partner is cheating

[Tcherie]

Hello, this is my first post but i really have no one to talk to about this. I have never had reasons to doubt my relationship with my partner. We are expecting a little boy and have 16weeks to go. But someone we both know put a post on social media saying ‘ how can someone tell them they love them and that one day they’ll be together, then say they are having a baby to turn around and say that his partner lost the baby just to get a ‘f*ck’ and that he doesn’t think he can have children to then say they are still having a baby’
Like i said i never had reason to doubt my relationship but seeing that and knowing the person it just gave me such a feeling inside ( my partner said he didn’t think he could have children) also this girl who posted this they have always been friends on social media etc but they no longer are so that made me feel even more like ‘ oh my god please surely not’ so i messaged her because it felt so close to home asking her if she knew if my partner had done something behind my back ( could be the reason they aren’t friends anymore etc and she said i have nothing to worry about and to take care and for me that was just such a odd reply. Then later on that day she posted on social media saying ‘when you have done something and you feel like such a bad person but you can’t say anything or the world could crash down’ i just have a feeling. Im sorry about the ranting on it probably doesn’t make much sense either but i just have mo idea what to do.

Maybe it isn't directed at you, you've given her the chance to tell you and she said not to worry, I would think if was you she'll want to spill the beans, only you know if you trust your partner or not.
There is attention seekers and shit stirrers out there try not to take everything to heart.

@Tcherie

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

I can see why you are worried.

So it could be that he was having sex with her, you got pregnant, she’s said omg fuck off to him, he then said lost the baby and he can’t have kids (implying what - that to be pregnant you must have been unfaithful and the baby was someone else’s?) so she went back to him, now it turns out you’re still pregnant and he doesn’t want her now. ?

So it’s over and she’s hurting. But doesn’t want to ruin your world (..) or agreed with him not to say. But why then posting such stuff on FB?

I have only one concern here and that’s your baby and you.

That’s why I’m not sure it’s good for you to go barrelling in and worrying. Not sure what you will find.

I don’t know if it’s possible to just forget about for now and enjoy being pregnant. I’m not sure. Obviously otherwise the first thing would be to talk to him.

Why did she post where you could both see??? And everyone?

Maybe it’s not to do with you. As she wouldn’t have done that?

Sorry, Op. always just take a deep breath and remember how lovely it is to be pregnant and how your job now is to look after your baby as well as yourself. So no need to get upset. Whatever happens, you’ve got a child now and that love is very pure.

I can see why you’re worried. I actually think you should try and work this out sooner rather then later otherwise it’s always going to be on the back of your mind, potentially for years to come.

Did he mention why they are no longer friends on social media?
Tell him you spoke to her in a light tone and watch his reaction, if he looks like a dear in the headlights you know you're on to something.

There must be something more to be causing you to have this gut feeling though. Most people would just roll their eyes at the drama llama status, not freak out and assume it was about them.

*deer

She sounds like a hell of a drama queen.

Have you been suspicious of his movements over the last few months?

That does sounds very suspicious and I can see why you are worrying.

I also think mention to him that you'd seen such and such today and you both had a little chat. See what his reaction is.
If its completely cool and he asks what did you chat about, how is she etc probably nothing to worry about.
If he goes quiet or changes the subject or looks very sheepish, then unfortunately you may be right.
Either way you need to find out, to put your mind at rest.

Are you all 15 years old or something?

It's the only explanation for this absolute melodramatic lunacy?!

Do you each only have about 6 FB “friends’ or something? Is there an enormous backstory you’re going to share about your boyfriend always having had feelings for her and cheated before? Because if not, why would you automatically assume that this post was aimed at you rather than one of her other 674 ‘friends’?

This is so juvenile. Or mental.

It’s quite possible that woman is just getting back at someone who rejected her. Could be your bf, or some other guy with a pregnant gf.

It is very juvenile, but I also can see why you have the concern.

Regardless, this friend sounds like a drama Queen posting cryptic shite

Hmmm not sure, but could she be prompting a reaction to make you doubt him, and force you to find out, although she's told you not to worry. She may be wanting you to know but not be the one to break it to you? Drama Queen's are like this.

I know a girl who tried to find out from epuld be affair partner what was what and the woman told her nothing was going on. But then later it all came out that when she got the message from her, the affair partner had phoned him and he had told her to lie 'or else'.

It may be that she fears the consequences from him if he finds out she told you. Usually the consequences are 'I will never talk to you again'. And that's a problem because even though she knows she is being treated like shit, she is hooked.

I would think she is trying to tell you. Hoping that he wont see her posts as they are no longer fb friends.

Start being sneaky. Hopefully if he knows you suspected, he now thinks your fears have been put to rest. Time to do some detective work.

You could even message any shared friends that are close to her and ask them who she is talking about. Chances are that if it's your partner and they know, they will reply 'I think you should ask her' (as opposed to 'I dont know' or 'its tom from tesco').