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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling shit & want to apologise - but when the shoe's on the other foot....

2 replies

MustStayStrong01 · 04/04/2021 12:29

Came right out and said some awful truths to my mother on the phone this morning... We have a firey relationship (I think she's a type of Narcissist but not the worst kind)... She often puts me down, not often, regularly... She gets so nasty when thing's don't appear to be going her way in a conversation... I usually change subject, ask to speak to Dad and or then end the call quickly at that point.
This morning I let rip... Didn't let her get a word in, I've never ever been able to do this... And then said some awful home truths which I know will have upset her greatly. But she's often said things to me me that have hurt me and never apologised. I'm fighting the urge to call and apologise as it won't achieve anything but cement the pattern of being submissive and her having the control she desperately wants.
I live a long way away and I'm pregnant.

OP posts:
pog100 · 04/04/2021 12:34

Well done, is all I can say. Welcome to a happier, healthier stage of your life, together with your soon to born child. Do not apologise.

Youmakemyheartgogiddyup · 04/04/2021 12:34

I wouldn't necessarily apologise but would probably send a message stating that it's a shame the conversation ended that way but I am so fed up with.. (things she does) so I exploded.

Letting rip isn't usually the best way to deal with things but by the sounds of it you've put up with a lot and sometimes it's the only way.

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