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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

Original poster

Single status on social media

24 replies

concretethinker · 31/03/2021 15:46

Just realised that my bf of eight months has his status set on single
On fb.
Haven't said anything yet .
Amy ideas how to broach the topic . We are in our forties and committed .

OP posts:

category12 · 31/03/2021 15:51

How much does he use Facebook? If he's an avid user always keeping his profile up to date and posting loads, then it's a minor concern. If not, it's more likely it just hasn't crossed his mind.

Unless you have other reason to distrust him?

VictoryCow · 31/03/2021 15:54

Did he ever change it?

I (32) have been with my boyfriend (house, dog etc together) for five years and I am still 'single' on facebook and I assume he hasn't changed his either.

DeathToCovid · 31/03/2021 15:57

I think in your 40s having a relationship status on Facebook isn’t really anyone’s priority in life. He probably has forgotten there is even a relationship section. My bf 2 years and I aren’t even FB friends

Original poster

concretethinker · 31/03/2021 16:01

He shares a lot but doesn't update his profile .
Should I just be ye the bullet and ask him why?
It's not a massive issue as we are together such a short time but still...
No reason to distrust him

OP posts:

HeartsAndClubs · 31/03/2021 16:01

I don’t ever update my FB profile so I assume that my status is showing as single, and I’ve been with my DP for 8 years.

I used to know someone who had never updated his profile either and it still showed him as being married to his ex even though he was then married to someone else.

Original poster

concretethinker · 31/03/2021 16:02

I don't put any relationship status on it. Never did .
Will I leave it ? I'm not enormously bothered

OP posts:

Original poster

concretethinker · 31/03/2021 16:03

I don't want to comeacross as a stalker either

OP posts:

Mum4Fergus · 31/03/2021 16:04

Yeah, I think you should leave it

Topjoe19 · 31/03/2021 16:05

I've been married for 4 years & still got single on my FB status! Not bothered what DH has got... maybe don't worry unless you don't trust him for some reason

category12 · 31/03/2021 16:05

I wouldn't mention it. Especially if you don't update your relationship status yourself.

wusbanker · 31/03/2021 16:06

No one updates that any more! Doesn't mean anything.

Oaktree123 · 31/03/2021 16:29

I dont think it means anything, he probably set it years ago and never occurred to him it could be changed.

ShadierThanaPalmTree · 31/03/2021 16:47

If it's bothering you then I would ask him directly, there's no other way to find out if it's just because he hasn't thought about it or if it's intentional.

Sakurami · 31/03/2021 17:09

He probably can't see his own status - noone checks what their profile looks like to other people. I've never had a relationship status on my profile ...I figure my friends know anyway so don't see the point.

But if my boyfriend's said single then I would bring it up.

CarefulNoww · 31/03/2021 17:11

I think it took me about 4 years to notice mine was set as single after being engaged.

SM is all just bollocks isn't it, I wouldn't worry.

sunnyzweibrucken · 31/03/2021 18:34

This would bother me a little. Only because one of my ex's changed his status the second he called it quits with me. While i was still just mourning the relationship, i found that a bit hurtful for him to do so soon. But i dated another guy for a few years and we were never even friends on FB and my status was single the entire time.

sammylady37 · 31/03/2021 18:54

Nobody really updates this anymore, do they? If I saw on my feed now that John has updated his relationship status I think I’d roll my eyes a little and wonder why he bothered.

Lucyccfc68 · 31/03/2021 19:08

The only people I ever see update their relationship status on FB are the drama queens and attention seekers.

Be glad your DP is neither of those.

MilduraS · 31/03/2021 19:11

My Facebook status has been single since I signed up in 2007 and I'm married now. No interest in broadcasting my relationship to the world. Though I'm not a big SM user anyway.

Otter71 · 01/04/2021 04:00

My current dp isn't on FB. If you want to put in a relationship it needs you to say with who and message them to agree. So I have it just on divorced. What does yours say? I thought it changed both or neither?

Snally82 · 02/04/2021 06:12

My 17 year old nephew and his friends all set there relationship status but tbh, that’s about it! I don’t have a clue what my own says!

Opentooffers · 02/04/2021 07:32

It's a non issue, I've always been single on FB, and will stay that way until married, though have had and do have a BF.

B0wl0fCrabS0up · 02/04/2021 10:09

My FB has always been single status since the beginning

In that time I've had 2 long term relationships, one ongoing

I've never received any complaints

However, someone that doesn't know me well may be a bit confused I guess

CuthbertDibbleandGrubb · 02/04/2021 16:39

If it has always been that, no issue. If changed recently, then is.

You could just leave Facebook and stop supporting a media platform that fails to act quickly on hateful speech including misogyny.

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