No sex since New Year's Eve!!!

[izzy1603]

Sooooo, we haven't had sex since New Year's Eve!!!

I'm always tired so I go to bed quiet early and he stays up late most nights playing his PlayStation and talking to his friends.

I mean I am tired all the time from working and looking after our 2 year old.

I've asked him numerous times if he wants to come to bed early so you know, but he never does.

I'm just not sure if he wants to anymore? I don't know, i don't know why I'm posting this just need to get it off my chest I suppose!

Any advice welcome ☺️

Have you talked to him about it?

@saffire we have spoke about it but it gets turned into a joke. Like he will reply and say I need to know your schedule so I know what days we can have sex.

Like yesterday, it was about 10:30pm and o said I was going up to bed. He said he'd finish his drink and join me.

So I waited, put greys anatomy on. Ended up watching two episodes and he didn't come up so fell asleep 😂!

He doesn't try with me and I don't try with him either tbh!

Tell him outright

say "I want to have sex tonight. here. now"

see what he does/how he reacts.

How is your relationship in other ways ? Are you affectionate with each other .. kidding, cuddling, the way you talk to each other ?
Do you still make an effort with to show how much you love/ want each other ?
How was your sexy life before becoming parents ?

Can you try when your DC is napping during the day on the weekend?
Instead of just the usual bed time.

For various reasons, our sex life has to be arranged, so I just mention it early enough in the day so that we both expect it come evening time.

I think it’s easy not to bother sometimes, so you have to nudge it along!

I can imagine if we didn’t do this we’d be in your position.

Just to add, prearranging it doesn’t make it boring! It’s still great.

We also mainly will let each other know when we are up for it and plan. It works for us for various reasons.

I'd try planning regular nights and see what happens. If he refuses to meet you halfway or make any effort at all, then you have a problem.

Tell him if he'd rather pay more attention to his playstation and his friends than his lover, you won't accept it. I should have said exactly this and maybe it wouldn't be Feb 2011 the last time we had sex. . .

Just take him by the hand and to the bedroom? Or straddle him in his gaming chair?

Fgs , just say shall we have sex, make it known what you want.
We both do this, it works fab.
However our relationship is a priority not secondary in life, behind a PlayStation for instance or a career.

If he wanted it, he would come and join you in bed....he is making a very clear choice not to.

Are you sure its just his mates he sits up late talking to?

What about morning sex?

Why is sex a bedroom, night-time only thing?

But yeah, he doesn't sound fussed if he didn't bother coming up when he was on a promise.

Does he do his fair share at home? Why are you the knackered one and him gaming?