What to do

[Dollyblueeyes]

So from November, I started speaking to a man and got to know quite a bit about him, we haven't actually met up as I have been going through a messy split with my ex partner. He has arranged to meet, then pulls away at the last minute. Four weeks ago I told him I was done due to me feeling like it wasn't going anywhere and me doing all the chasing. He was fuming with me and told me I'd got it so wrong and all the reasons why he'd been like that, I apologised and asked if we could put it behind us , he said yes, but it's been strained since , he also suffers with depression (again only realised recently) I try to pull away he pulls me back but not with enough to know what's wrong or where is anywhere this is going , I do really like himI've asked if he wants to stop, but he says sorry been busy with whatever or he's really down , I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know if it's his depression or he's holding back because of my split . Ive asked that he honest with me but he never confirms anything either way. So confused. How can I say what is going on here with out sounding desperate or pushy ?

To be honest it doesn't look like this is going anywhere. If it's this much hard work before you've even met if doesn't bode well for the future. You don't really know anything about him other than what he's told you, you've no way of knowing who he really is after 4 months 🙄

Maybe delete and block? You haven’t even met the guy so you need to stop being so invested and move on from this drama. You don’t need to find out what is going on

The fact he reacted with anger when you raised valid concerns and tried to break it off is a big red flag. As does getting you to apologise 🙄 and sounds like he's been punishing you for it since. I'd break off contact, I think your earlier instincts were bang on. Listen to yourself x

This sounds like major hard work and you haven’t even met yet.

This really is a non starter. Unless you’re actually enjoying the drama, just block him.

I think you are all so right, guess I'm just being too nice and giving him too much consideration why I don't know. Thank you

How can you really like a man you've never met? You don't know him, he's a stranger off the internet. Agree with PP, just delete and block.

Hi no he's not a stranger off the internet, I do know him from previously.

Ah, OK, so he is someone you actually know, just not met up with since you've been talking. He still sounds like a lot effort and that he's not terribly invested. If you want to remain on reasonable terms because you're likely to bump into him, I'd just be upfront. Tell him it doesn't feel like he's in the right place for a relationship, so best to leave things for now.

FFS. Why are you so eager to go from one bad relationship to another? This guy is a twat with abuser written all over him. Block and move on.

Too much drama already. Block and move on.

Thank you everyone I know your all correct. It has felt like he's been punishing me since I spoke out tbh. Think I just liked the attention as it was a distraction from all the mess that's going on with my ex.