Been with DH for 20+ years with 2 teenage children. There have been multiple issues over the years, which have been more pressing for me in the last 2 or 3. When the kids were small I just got on with it (and to my shame) did not address things that needed addressing like lack of work ethic, DH not getting help with depression (gone on for many years), walking on eggshells around him and generally not really being me or in many ways a proper family (so many things I just did by myself when they were small and he was depressed). Things came to a head in the Autumn - he thinks it is covid - but lockdown has just shown me what my future will be when the kids have left if dramatic changes aren't made. He has made lots of promises - starts a new job this week, promised to get help when depression next hits and does not see any problem and that he is now doing everything I asked. To the outside world he is chatty, funny and adoring. There are many things now that if they happened again (or didn't happen if he said they would) that I will no longer tolerate, we will be finished. But these are the "major" things. He is in a "good place" at the moment, and thinks that this absolves everything from the past because "he's okay now" - and I guess I have asked him to do some things and need to give him the chance to prove himself with them. However tiny little things about how he thinks and reacts to things suck the joy from me and make me doubt there is any hope for the future. Some little examples - I wrapped in clingfilm (I usually use brown paper - and I wrap them so they don't spill fillings everywhere) and he had a go at me at how terrible it is for the world. This week my children bought me flowers, and I also bought some for my mum . Not something I usually have for myself or rarely buy for others and got a lecture on how terrible the cut flower industry is and why can't I enjoy flowers that are just outside. I know these sound like silly things but in a second something that made me feel good has made me feel shit. He will tell me he adores me and I am the best thing that has happened to him. But rarely a day goes past without some little thing that either feels like a dig or him thinking his opinion is more valuable and worthy than mine. My emotions are all over the place - I will have a glimmer of happiness or the though of what a great future we could have together followed by feeling like I will never really be able to be truly me or live the life I want on basis day to day things. Am I being oversensitive or a doormat?