Won't sleep over...

[Mummytoarron]

Ugh, this is really upsetting me.

Me and my OH have been together almost a year now. Things were going great, then we hit a bit of a rough patch due to my ex interfering and other stresses which put a strain on things, we almost split up but we managed to hold it together and I can say now that we seem to have came out the other end and things are good.

Before all the stress my OH would stay every night but when things got rough he went back home to his mums. He went back there last October and hasn't stayed over once since.

I've addressed the situation more than a couple of times and I've had a number of excuses.

1. He likes his own space.
2. The dog stinks (my dog is now out of the equation as he was put to sleep over a month ago, he was extremely wiffy due to a bad skin condition)
3. He doesn't see why he needs to, it doesn't define our relationship.

I just struggle with it as I think it does define our relationship, not completely, but i believe it plays a part, to have that closeness and have that intimacy, and I don't just mean in a sexual way, security, trust and commitment.

I'm not expecting him to be here every single night, even just the weekends, as he has pointed out that there's no point in him staying through the week as I'm away out to work at 9am with him not starting til 1pm so he would be left on his own (BUT I thought he liked his own space?) Were both off at wkends so would work great.

Anyways, I approached the subject again last night, and he said "he will have a think about it". I'm sorry but what is there actually to think about?

It hurts because I just want him here and he clearly doesn't feel the same way.

Am I being OTT? He says that I'm never happy and I'm always wanting more. I love him and want to build with him so what is wrong with wanting something more?

It does sound like he's not as into you as you are of him?
Does he think about/want to have a future with you or are you a stopgap until he wants to move on?

Just get rid.
It's been less than a year.

He lives with his mum
He's been chatting up other women
His dick doesn't work and he refuses to do anything about it.
He comes over most days but won't spend the night. Hope you're not also cooking him dinner every time.

At this early months it's already not good.
Cut your losses

FWB 🌺

@RantyAnty

Just get rid. It's been less than a year.

He lives with his mum
He's been chatting up other women
His dick doesn't work and he refuses to do anything about it.
He comes over most days but won't spend the night. Hope you're not also cooking him dinner every time.

At this early months it's already not good.
Cut your losses

This.

Way too much drama when it should be the best part of a relationship.

I had a partner for 4 years who never stayed over and he cited that he got terrible headaches when he stayed with anyone. He had had the same issue with other girlfriends. I suspect now he had Aspergers as it was a very strange setup.