Confused on what this guy wants?

[kisha4567]

What does it mean when a guy unprotected sex with you. I’ve been seeing him for a year now and he also was ask if he wants to c*m inside me. I’m not sure if he wants a kid he has one already which he can’t see. So I don’t know if he is hoping for another. And yes I told him I wasn’t on the pill.

Much more importantly, what do you want?

What do you mean what does it mean? It means he doesn’t care about your health or the risk of pregnancy is what it means. What else could it mean?

Do you mean condom-free or entirely without contraception? If the former: it’s because he prefers the sensation and doesn’t care about STIs. If the latter: some men get a kick out of knowing pregnancy could ensue from sex.

But your question suggests that your focus is wrong. As PP have said: what do you want? Ideally children should be the result of careful planning, not something that happens because a guy finds risky sex a turn-on.

And the fact he can’t see his existing child is a concern.

He wants to trap you.
Get yourself on the pill and using condoms.
Better still - get rid of this loser.
Sorry to be blunt. I am a long time reader of mumsnet. I have never felt the need to comment until today. PLEASE protect yourself. X

This can't be a serious post

It doesn't mean anything.

Lots of guys are happy to take the risk that you get pregnant and then either push you to get an abortion or leave you to be a single mum (with you chasing them.fir child maintenance payments).

It really doesn't mean anything.

He doesn't see his child .. not a good sign about him at all. (He'll blame the mother for stopping him but that's usually a lie).

Anyway, why don't you ask him??!!

You can have sex with him, have his dick inside you but you can't ask him a question??

Like "what do you want here? I'm not taking the pill as I told you and you're suggesting sex without condoms; I could obviously get pregnant, what do want here?

Why are you considering this anyway, it's only been a year, you're not married, you don't live together (?), what's your money situation etc.

Do. Not. Have. Unprotected. Sex. With. This. Man. There are no good reasons (for you) why he wants to have unprotected sex. You haven’t agreed to start a family together.

He cannot see his child - what is that all about?

Red flags all over this man. Be very careful OP.

It means he's a twat.

Why are you shagging a twat?

It means that he wants sex without protect. Some guys get a kick out of the risk. The point being if you end up pregnant he wouldn’t be there supporting you. Please don’t make the mistake of thinking it’s because he has feelings for you.

He sounds awful. Do yourself a favour and don’t see him again.

What the fuck are you doing risking a pregnancy with a man who can't see the child he already has? Violent? Child abuser?

Do you wanna a child? Happy to have social services remove said child? Then carry on as you are.

I think you need to have a proper talk with him, especially after a year.

(Looking at your other threads) - has he form for this? You've posted before about pregnancy worries. Don't let him pressure you into unprotected sex.

It means he doesn't care about the child he doesn't see and he doesn't care about making more. Because he thinks its 'your problem' if you get pregnant. A horrible, selfish fuckwit.

Why the hell are you sleeping with someone without protection when you arent on the pill? Stop being a fool.

Why can't he see the child he has already?

That would really worry me.

Hasn't he heard of HIV, AIDS, syphillis, Chlamydia? If a man wanted sex without a condom with me I would tell him to fuck off and stick his puny cock in a blow up doll.

Why don't you want to ask him, @kisha4567? Does he make you uncomfortable about sex?

It means he doesn't care about your sexual health enough to discuss this properly.

It means he doesn't care about you getting pregnant enough to discuss this properly and is likely to assume you will terminate if he wants you to.

It means he prioritises his sexual preferences over your sexual health.

It means you are in no position to be having unprotected sex with someone you can't talk to about having unprotected sex.

He has a child he 'can't see'. I'm assuming that's because of a 'mental ex' who 'won't let him'?

He's a run of the mill, immature prick and you're being foolish and irresponsible to even consider unprotected sex with him.

If you get pregnant then you are both equally complicit in bringing a child into a barely there, dysfunctional relationship with two parents who can't even discuss sex openly like adults.

That all sounds harsh but this is serious stuff.

This is concerning. It means he couldn’t care less if you end up in a very difficult situation.

It definitely doesn’t mean he wants to have children with you, if that’s what you are wondering. It probably just means he prefers the feeling of unprotected sex and hasn’t given a moments thought to what would happen if it resulted in a baby.

This doesn't mean he wants to have children with you - he has no self control, likes the feeling if unprotected sex. He sounds selfish and immature. Please protect yourself OP.