Do you and your DH/DP agree about COVID issues?

[Anon778833]

I’m interested to know how many couples are in agreement, either way particularly about the vaccines. I keep hearing (mostly anti-vaxxers) saying that it is splitting a lot of people up but I do doubt this...

Yes. Both 100% agreement. So is every other couple we know. Never heard of any couple (outside social media or in the press) who have differing views. Like you, OP I doubt if there are really that many.

Nope. It’s one of the reasons why we are splitting up in fact.

What makes you doubt it btw??

Yes we are.

yup

No we don't and if we had other issues then it would probably be the final nail tbh. It's ok to have a clash of personalities but I've felt it impose on my freedom, and have had to curb what I want to do to keep the peace as it invariably leads to a falling out.

We find total lockdown easier to navigate as there's no grey areas and I can direct my annoyance at the rules rather than my dp. He would have happily lived the last 12 months under total lockdown, and anything I did when there was a relation of restrictions caused a lot of upset over putting our family at risk.

If there wasn't an end in sight then we would have to separate as I couldn't commit to living with his health anxiety issues long term.

Sorry we both agree on the vaccine at least...desperate to put covid behind us and be a team again which should happen once we're vaccinated.

Yes thank goodness. Covid-related disagreements have caused a bit of a rift between family this year, so I am very grateful that DH and I are on the same page.

I can appreciate that some people won’t agree but I think my ex is particularly irrational. He thinks by being in the same room as me, his DNA could be altered. Because I’ve had the vaccine 🤔

We don't agree...... and that's fine. I've had my vaccine and he says he doesn't want his. Again that's fine. I'm not in this relationship to impose my views and opinions on my partner..... and vice versa. He's fine with me having my vaccine and wouldn't tell me not to have it. What we do with our own bodies is our own choices. Our opinions on the virus are totally separate to how I feel about my partner as my soulmate, fiancé and father of my child. I certainly wouldn't end an 8 year relationship..... after all, we both have survived this pandemic untouched. I'm grateful for that.

I couldn't live with an anti vaxxer because it would mean they would be so different to me that we would have nothing in common. I would despise them.

@SugarbabyMilly

I can appreciate that some people won’t agree but I think my ex is particularly irrational. He thinks by being in the same room as me, his DNA could be altered. Because I’ve had the vaccine 🤔

Jesus. Hard core anti-vaxer then. Is he normally like this or is it a lockdown thing?

I think it will get harder and harder not to have the vaccine. So if I were you I would shut it down as a conversation topic, so it’s not being fed - hopefully he’ll regain his sense.

@SugarbabyMilly that is irrational bordering on delusional. Sadly they are in such numbers it's not treated this way.

@Cookerhood I agree. To me it's as divisive as Brexit as it's telling of your values. I would feel I have nothing in common with a person who had these beliefs. Our issues are connected to DPs health anxiety and aversion to risk which is just who he is. It's never impacted on my own life though which is why we struggle now.

I've been delighted to discover that my bf and I are on the same page on this, yes. As he's "just" my bf I have the luxury of simply being able to stop seeing him if he'd taken unnecessary risks or started talking about microchips being implanted. Like TomorrowsPrincess I wouldn't be interested in trying to force my viewpoint on him, so I'd be off. Couldn't respect someone any more after that.

Yes, we are both fully supportive of the vaccines and have both been being careful. Dh is a bit more lax (when it comes to work mainly) than I am, but I'm Cv.
Me catching Covid in October and ending up in hospital was a big wake up call for me, dh and Dd as well. Before than we didn't really know anyone close to us who'd had it. Made us all a lot of Cilicia ant and alert.

He doesn’t / can’t / won’t absorb the science behind vaccines.

My IBS has flared & he’s saying it must be the vaccine that caused it but I actually think it’s a year of hearing him talk nothing but conspiracy theories. He has even fallen out with his mum. Her partner has COPD and she says they won’t see him unless he has the vaccine. I think this is completely understandable.

He’s pushed so many people away including me but he’s convinced that his way of thinking is the right one.

Conspiracy theorists always are. I try to avoid arguing with the ones I know these days.

The vaccine triggers an immune response (I think), which is what it's supposed to do. Different people will have different symptoms. Some might get a raised temperature, a headache or feel a bit off maybe but it wears off in a day or two for most people, tops. Maybe for you it cause an IBS flare-up, no idea, but it should settle. I think you did the right thing by getting vaccinated.

I agree, I definitely think I did the right thing.

Yes - he carries hand sanitiser and sanitises before he goes into shops and on coming out and I always forget (unless I'm with him) but we have the same view on vaccines and precautions in general

Yes, we agree 100%, and have stuck to the rules 100%. DP works in the funeral industry and has seen first hand the number of people who are dying, and he has to sit through the funerals watched loved ones in bits and not able to comfort each other.

It's horrific.

It's not seen as being on the front line, but it's very much allowing him to see the true impact.

We're totally in agreement as we're both intelligent and know that all the anti vaxx anti Covid noise is just that.

Very glad to hear he's an ex OP!

Yes on the same page. Over a year ago last Jan/Feb I was much more concerned because I was following the worldwide news closely (I often check some Asian news sites as part of my job anyway) and could see it kicking off but DH was quite dismissive thinking it was another sars type scare that would end up being no big numbers, relatively speaking. We had a few disagreements as I was getting very worried.

He pretty quickly realised when it hit Italy (was that early March?) this was different and since then we've been very similar - cautious, rule abiding but trying to keep positive and enjoy what we can do as a family. We will both get our vaccines when it's our turn.

@lindaellen Hi. I'm a funeral director in Essex. May I ask whereabouts your DP is based? We had no change in the amount of funerals from 2019 to 2020 which is quite strange. There are always plenty of appointments left for registering deaths too. Maybe there is a geographical link or something.

I couldn't live with an anti vaxxer either.

We are going to get our jabs together tomorrow.