I think I've finally go to the bottom of it

[TLV]

at the weekend dh changed his mobile acc details which they sent to the home email address and curiosity got the better of me and I looked at the account, there was a mobile number on there which he was texting and when I say he was texting alot I mean its more than 30 times in one day from 7.45am up till 11.55pm, I confronted him about it and he has said its someone he knows through work (they live at the other end of the country I should add) and that he was confiding in them and nothing more, he saw her at a conference 2 months ago and he pretty much changed after getting back, stopped leaving his mobile lying around, deleting all messages, he left three weeks ago and in that time wants a divorce and sell the house and won't even consider reconciling, the bitch is even texting him whilst he is here seeing dd and he is lying and saying that its his family, he is coming to talk tomorrow night and I'm unsure what to do or say.

I'm so sorry to hear this TLV. I remember your previous thread and your situation was spookily like my split with exp. He left for 'apparently' no reason then a while later a woman friend came out of the woodwork who he'd been confiding in.
They are still together nearly 5 years later, but it took him a year to admit that she was the reason he left.
Why is he coming to talk? Do you still want to reconcile now you know there is another woman on the scene?

Bloody texts thats how I found out my H was cheating - what I did was scream and shout throw all his clothes out the front door

Oh TVL

It seems so classic i know how you feel -you want to fight for him for your family and for your own self respect. Dont surpress any of those feelings and remember he will be more prepared for the 'talk' than you will be as he has had a lot longer to think about what he wants.

Give yourself some time and make sure you know your rights - with regaurd to house ect - it may be worth seeking legal advice in case he wants to start the ball rolling.

However the shouting and screaming may give him the 'excuse' to run to the other woman.
If he is going to leave he will whatever, i think the best thing you can do is to be calm polite, and not agree to anything he wants to quickly.

The other woman will be waiting and wanting him to come running back saying how awful you are blah blah blah...

You are doing so well and are a strong person who has already proved you dont need him - now show him what he is really missing by acting the way he is.

Good luck

Oh you poor thing, it's like yet another kick in the teeth isn't it.
I think it's a real shame that men can't realise what they have at home and have to mess everything up for their wives and kids before they realise they were better off before.
Men are just a bunch of shits.
(Sorry to anyone who is a nice man!)

well i phoned her!! will fill yous all in later

bloody hell.........what happened?

we're all waiting...

?

"Men are just a bunch of shits."

Nice. Rational. Fair. Thanks a bunch.

Sounds like some kicking in the cock is in order.

I hate men, can I kick him in the cock too?

Honestly - affairs were alot more difficult before mobiles and email

Oh TLV am so sorry to hear this
That's exactly how I found out about my H too and I know exactly what you're going through.

What happened with the phone call? Are you ok?

well she has denied all, apparently happily married and i asked her if she has any decency to stay away and I think she has

god you're brave phoning her but what will your dp say when she tells him you called her?

Oh TLV

She obviously has a hell of a lot to lose if she is married too and I think she has panicked.

From reading your other thread and the way the alarm bells went for you when he was texting so much (even before you knew she was on the scene) I just don't think it looks good.

I wouldn't believe a word she says

Or him for that matter.

Are you ok?