Bullied by old teacher. Was this the norm?

[PreciousOcean]

Back in school, 2007 and earlier, I was bullied pretty badly by one of my teachers. He always singled me out. He bad mouthed me to other students. Was pretty awful towards me. It's not in my head. He treated me appallingly. It broke my self confidence and I still obsess over it sometimes now. I fantasise over confronting him and asking him what his problem was with me. Being bullied as a child by an adult is really fucking awful.

Was this a normal experience for people? How do I essentially 'get over' it? Even my parents remember how bad it was but never really did anything about it.

Sorry posted in wrong part. Will report.

I was also bullied by a teacher at school. No, it's not normal and I still think about it to this day. I used to feel sick right before his class (history), and eventually I told my parents. I was removed from his class by my year head but that was all the action they took.

@HexWitch

I was also bullied by a teacher at school. No, it's not normal and I still think about it to this day. I used to feel sick right before his class (history), and eventually I told my parents. I was removed from his class by my year head but that was all the action they took.

Mine was music. My favourite subject. I think I would've done so much better had I had a different teacher. Sorry you also experienced bullying from a teacher. It's horrific.

Was bullied by one in my primary school. Had her 2 years. First year when I was young in primary she lifted me up by the throat into a chokehold once. For no reason. Then in the later year a few years later it was just mental abuse. I was small and quiet and guess that's why she did it. Narcissists target the vulnerable.

Theres a lot of these nutters in the teaching profession. Tbh I think all teachers and anyone working with the vulnerable or any position of power should have to pass a psych test to show that arent psychopaths and similar.

Not common but not unheard of either. I had similar at A level by my maths teacher who was horrified a girl was in his class (I was one of only 2 first time need not had only boys apparently). The other girl left after about 8 weeks I stuck it out cos I lived maths but learning suffered and by the time it was addressed I had fallen too far behind to catch up.
This kind of thing needs other adults to intervene. If that doesn't happen the damage is unlimited as far as the perpetrator takes it. I have let it go now but it took years to do that.
I think your parents let you down, perhaps ill equipped to deal with it, perhaps underestimated the issue... If my kids ever suffer this I'll have their back for sure.
I'm sorry you weren't through this, I think counselling would be helpful, it helped me, I did CBT to break the effects on my thought processes, very effective.

@Wanderlusto

Was bullied by one in my primary school. Had her 2 years. First year when I was young in primary she lifted me up by the throat into a chokehold once. For no reason. Then in the later year a few years later it was just mental abuse. I was small and quiet and guess that's why she did it. Narcissists target the vulnerable.

Theres a lot of these nutters in the teaching profession. Tbh I think all teachers and anyone working with the vulnerable or any position of power should have to pass a psych test to show that arent psychopaths and similar.

Jesus. I'm so sorry. I'd be devastated if a teacher did that to my son.

Just remembered another in primary school but she targeted a group I was in not me individually. Still a nutter and an out and out bitch mind you. The damage was less (yay) because it was not individual victims.

I'm sorry you were treated in such a way. In terms of "getting over it" is counselling an option for you?

I've had several rounds of CBT to help me deal with anxiety and the bullying I faced at school has come up. Talking about it really really helped me be able to deal with it. Some advice my counsellor gave me was to write a letter or talk to a chair as if you're confronting them. Often the confrontation isn't about their reaction but you being able to talk about how it made you feel in a way you couldn't back then.

Don't beat yourself up for still being upset about it, bullying is a horrible thing that can have a long term impact.

I don't know if I ever told my parents. Probably too scared to as thought I must deserve it somehow.
And in the later year, she talked the talk. Made out she was helping me with stuff forcing me to stay late ect... made me feel stupid, so I believed it too. Even though I knew she was horrible I thought she was the adult so must be right and have her reasons.

Funny thing is I saw her once as an adult and she was all friendly. And so was I, and then later that night it all just hit me and I got so upset. Guess I'd repressed it.

But yeah, just makes you wonder how safe it really is to send kids to school. Guess you just never know.

I was bullied by a teacher in junior school, this then made the other kids think it was OK to do it to.
I fantasise about confronting her every now and again when I get caught up thinking about it.
A few years ago I mentioned it to another teacher from the school who I had a good relationship with. She told me she was friends with the bully and we stopped talking.
The school was corrupt at the time trying to cover it up when social services were involved so I'm not surprised that the other teacher didn't like it mentioning.

I think we fantasise about confronting them because we were so vulnerable at the time but we are a similar age now so could actually stand up for ourselves.

I honestly feel like namechanging on here and naming the bitch that did it 😂🙈

It still happens today. My daughter was terrified of a primary school teacher, but as she's ASD found it hard to articulate to me why she was scared. I had a chat with the teacher who looked bemused as to why and assured me everything was fine. Got a call to say the head needed to see me. This horrible piece of shit had been making fun of her, mocking her stims, rolling her eyes and laughing at her if she cried. Then totally gaslighted her making her feel like she was going mad. A couple of pupils picked up on it and had reported her. Nothing was done as teacher talked her way out of it. But a teaching assistant witnessed her shouting in my daughters face and then rough handling her out of the room when a meltdown ensued.

She was suspended immediately and subsequently sacked. A few complaints had already been made from other vulnerable pupils. Heart breaking. Just why!. I wish they'd listened to our concerns earlier. Daughter had to have therapy.

Hope you are ok OP it's no doubt something that you never really get over x

I was bullied by my O Level maths teacher, back in the mid-80s. Up until the O Level years I was really good at maths and had the same teacher for the first three years at secondary school who really took the time to explain things to everyone and was really approachable and I should’ve easily passed my O Level.

The teacher after that was a nightmare. Initially he picked on another girl, eventually her parents came into school and requested a move out of his class so he then needed a new target, which was me.

I really started to struggle, lost all confidence in my abilities and couldn’t ask him for help because he’d belittle me. I was always the person who he’d make stand at the blackboard to work on a problem, knowing full well I’d fail. I spent the end of many lessons sitting outside of the classroom because I’d failed to complete whatever he’d set within his timescale.
I fell behind, not just in maths but also in physics because I needed to use maths in that and had lost all confidence. Suffice to say, I didn’t pass either at O Level, I was dropped down to take the lesser CSE exams.

He never called me by name, it was always “You girl” as in “You girl, come here”, or “You girl, get out of my classroom”.

I didn’t tell my parents because they were sticklers for good behaviour and I knew they’d blame me for getting sent out and always being told off.

I was bullied by a lecturer in Scotland for being English (he wasn't even Scottish). I was walking and chatting to him when it started. I escaped into a shop pretending I had to buy something and the nice shop keepers reassured me.
He then refused to talk to me for the rest of the year. The problem was I had to go on a field trip organised by him. Other academics thought I was exaggerating until they witnessed his behaviour themselves. I was popular so they sorted it just about. But it was a horrible experience and I was an adult.

I got bullied by an old teacher in Junior school when I was 10/11. We were in maths sets and she was my maths teacher. Always picked on me. My maths was good, but not top set. They put me in her set, top set. She was brutal and horrid to me as I struggled, but instead of helping me she was constantly on my case. I got moved down a set and the work was too easy. That was what it was like throughout my high school education with maths.
Well, it didn’t stop me as I ended up working with money. Yay me! I can count!
So, I saw the old boot in a supermarket and mentioned she was my teacher at X school and taught me maths. I don’t think she recognised me, or refused to recognise me. As I slunk into my Mercedes sports car and she pootled off to her rusty old banger —broomstick—

I was bullied by a needlework teacher. The long-term effect has been that I only sew buttons on, nothing more advanced. The lovely woman who made my sort furnishings said it was very common. Apparently woodwork teachers were notorious too.

I’m so sorry that appalling behaviour in teachers is still going on; I’d hoped it might be a thing of the past. I was singled out by more than one teacher and some were utter bastards. Teaching by humiliation was the norm then too (think 70s/early 80s). Being mocked for not knowing an answer; a male science teacher belittling girl pupils and saying they ought not to be in a science class; same teacher turning up drunk once; teachers routinely ignoring bullying by children to their peers (actually normalising it). Some people are attracted to professions like teaching purely to get access to vulnerable people. My blood used to boil whenever I saw those smug bumper stickers that read ‘if you can read this, thank a teacher’. I’ll send them the bill for the therapy with the thank you note!

Sorry to hear this is still going on in fairly recent times, when I was 6 back in the 80s one particular teacher used to call me stupid and lazy, shout, when I struggled with my work, She even snatched my work off me in front of my mum.
She left the school but when she came back to visit a few years later, she said hello to a group of us apart from acknowledging me. Awful bully of a woman
So sad people in the position of power over children behave like this, actually I still get a bad feeling from some teachers when I've been at my children's school, can't put my finger on it but some are very hostile towards the children.