I've been in a relationship with my DP for almost 4 years. We are both 40, both parents and we don't live together. This last lockdown with the homeschooling has been really tough for me. Im trying to juggle 4 days of work against 2.5 days of study as well as parenting and homeschooling. Im exhausted. I've told my DP how exhausted I am and how stressed out I feel and he just brushes it off with comments like, 'tell me about it' or 'isn't everyone ' and 'can't your parents help' (for context they live close by but my Dad is still working and my Mum has cancer).
We see each other a couple of times a week, which isn't a hardship in itself but the only days he wants to see me are my busiest days (usually a Friday, a Sunday or a Monday). He also doesn't contribute anything because he doesn't drive, never has any money and says he's rubbish at DIY and cooking. I moved into my new house last year whilst I was still recovering from major surgery , then we went into lockdown so there is still a lot needing doing to my house.
I've said fair enough to those things but he has become quite emotionally dependent on me during lockdown too. He only sees me and his son so I'm getting the brunt of his moods and also everything else. He calls me several times a day and will just talk over me about whatever is going on in his life. Even the positive chats drain me now.
He talks and I just zone out, by the time I get to speak Im so tired from being talked at that I have nothing to give. In one respect its like a dating set up and in another its a very invested relationship and I just don't think I can do it anymore.
We haven't seen each other for 3 weeks now after a fight we had and he stormed out. We fought over this issue, I told him I was tired of his dumping on me and not supporting me and that I couldn't help him anymore and he stormed out. He has apologised and told me that he loves me but we haven't discussed anything else. He did tell me in the heat of the moment that helping me wasn't his responsibility and that my requests weren't 'make or break'. He knows how I feel and is waiting for me to 'let him know what I'm doing so he can get on with his life ' but I haven't because I just can't face making big decisions right now. I don't want to end a relationship at 40 because I'm tired and maybe we shouldn't expect other people to sort our lives out for us but without some support from a partner I just don't think I can have one. AIBU?