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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My 'ex' friend has turned into Miah off Coronation Street

3 replies

golds · 29/10/2004 16:50

I have posted about this particular friend before being a bit weird towards me this summer.

Well since the summer, she has done various things like organise days out and not invite me along, arrange a meal for her birthday and chose Indian as I am the only one who doesn't like Indian (yes I know its her right to pick her favourite meal for her birthday) but it was done with the intent of exclusion.

My 'ex' friend in the past has been clinically depressed and a self-harmer and basically if anyone stands up to her tactless comments (which she feels she can say without anyone confronting her due to her fragile state) she turns the tables round and tells everyone that you have been nasty to her and you are the reason for her wanting to kill herself.

Well about a month ago, I arrange a haloween party for my kids and 4 other kids plus mums (this Sunday), I didn't invite her because at that time she was still being funny with me and I thought stuff her. Well she has just found out about it and phoned me up and given me a ear full saying how nasty I am and how I talk about her to others and how I am making her ill again (all lies).

She ended the conversation by saying I was nasty and twisted before hanging up. Well quite frankly I'm better off without her, but it does bother me what she is saying to others she is very convincing and manipulative.

I don't know why I have posted this, just wanted to get it off my chest, I'm pleased we are no longer friends as I don't need this in my life, however she frightens me a little, I know I'm being silly, but I don't trust her next move.

Please don't think I am unsympathetic to her depression, I have supported her the best I could until she turned on me, and then I stood up to myself.

OP posts:
Caligula · 29/10/2004 17:09

Golds, life's too short. Your x friend sounds like she's terribly needy and while you can dispassionately feel sorry for her, you can't let her take up all your positive energy and brainspace. Emotional blackmail is not a good basis for friendship.

Don't worry about what others will think of you - true friends will give you a chance to tell your version, and those who don't aren't worth cluttering up your life with.

golds · 29/10/2004 17:14

Thats how I feel, but it can't but effect me, I am a senstive person too. Thankfully a few know what she's like, but I value others opinion of me.

Ive have tried the best I can with her, but now she's making me unhappy

OP posts:
hercules · 29/10/2004 17:15

I wouldnt worry about what she says to others. If they have any sense they'll see through it. Whenever I hear someone bad mouth someone else imo it just makes that person look bad.

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