Does anyone else have phases when they just don't like their friends?

[hotchocandcream]

First off for background, I'm single and live alone. I'm also an only child who grew up in a very remote area so spent a lot of my childhood and teens entertaining myself rather than spending time with friends.

I have a few close friends that I speak to or see regularly but sometimes I go through phases, and am going through one at the moment, when I just find them irritating and can't be bothered to spend time with them or even talk to them. Eventually, after a bit of time (I've never really measured it but I'm guessing it's minimum 2 or 3 weeks), I'll come round and want to speak to them again but it's probably one of the reasons my friendship circle is so small as some people obviously want more consistency from a friend. BTW, I don't express my irritation during these phases, I just put very little effort into the friendship and will actively avoid catching up with them.

Am I weird? Do I have some social dysfunction? Or are there others out there who feel the same sometimes?

You sound introverted. I can be like this and have accepted that is who I am. Sometimes I just want to be away from people for a while and my brain plays catch up and I process things and then am ready to get back into it again. Nothing wrong with it and there are lots of us around. We just keep quiet about it

I have times where I just need a break from people. I need time on my own just to be me.

It usually happens after I've spent a lot of time with them

You sound like the perfect friend OP
It's not social dysfunction, it sounds like classic introversion (which some people like to make out is some sort of dysfunction). You're in a minority being an introvert, but when you make friends with another introvert, it can become the perfect friendship!
When you feel you don't much care to spend time with your friends; that's your body telling you it needs time to recharge its batteries. Extroverts get energy from being with others. Introverts get energy from being alone to re-charge!

Yes and as I get older I sort of need friends less. I never have more than a few at one time. At the moment, I’m probably ditching a couple of friends. No hard feelings, they have their good points, but I also find them quite tiresome. I think I’ve been too nice and done too much of the emotional work perhaps as well. Moore peaceful on my own. Maybe I can find some more congenial friends, but friendship is overrated, for some of us anyway, and I would prefer to be on my own than deal with drama and selfishness!

Yes, and I just disappear for a while. It's nothing to do with them at all.
I have depression though.

I am like this... also going through the phase.. Don't really understand why as I already feel so desperately isolated & lonely during lockdown.. lone parent & furloughed so zero adult interaction at the moment but I just feel at times I need to withdraw.. sad thing is nobody not even my mum has noticed! Only my kids needing me at the moment is keeping me going 😢

I too am like this. Very introverted. Generally cope well by myself. I live with DS4 and DP so not alone, but haven’t struggled with missing family/friends over the last year. I do live 300 miles from my family though.

I can happily see a friend in person once a month in normal times and feel like I’ve got a decent social life. If I see two friends in the same week it wears me out socially if that makes sense?

I can and do go weeks without messaging them, but I do have two friends from childhood that I voice note weekly. They live 300 miles away so I see one maybe twice a year and the other maybe once every two years and.. you know what? It’s enough.

Im like this !!

I think it's normal to find even the people you love irritating at times, whether it's friends, family, partners, children....

Keeping your distance during these times is the right thing to do IMO.

I think the pandemic has put a lot of strain on relationships. We don't see friends that often anymore and maybe when we see them we find that our patience levels have gone down.

I wouldn't worry too much as long as they're essentially nice people.

I am exactly like this and have actually wondered what was wrong with me so I am pleased to see it’s not just me.

i'm exactly like this! maintaining friendships can be draining to me. and for some reason friends will start to annoy me so i will have to withdraw so i can have a break to get my mind in a better place to deal with them again. i'm VERY introverted and i've lost friends because of this but i'm okay with it.

I think I am like this... except for me I find that I seem to have some friendships where the conversation keeps coming round to the same subjects again and again. Maybe it’s me. During lockdown I’ve missed the freedom but not the hassle of arranging / attending catch ups or nights out.no think this is possibly due to laziness on my part. I’m probably a terrible friend!

I am like this too. I haven't worked out whether I'm an introvert, though I highly doubt it, but people do drain me. I'm fine with family, they don't expect much from me, so maybe that's the reason?

I will actively avoid people. I work in a job which is people facing. I'm meeting people in their homes, family members etc, and I find it really easy to converse with people I don't know. However, socially, thought I'm sociable, I just can't be bothered with small talk, it's exhausting, and I cannot be arsed!!