Disney Land

[BecauseMaybee]

A couple of years ago, MIL kept talking to my then 4 year old, who had never heard of Disney Land about it. She became infatuated by the idea of going there and we could not afford it. MIL likes to brag and was basically boasting to DD about how many times she had taken DH to Disney Land as a child as she worked FT in a high flying career and could afford to go there.
We spoke to MIL about it and asked her not to keep talking about it.

Fast forward 3 years and it's started again. Only this time, the Disney Land photo albums have come out and DD wants to know why we're not taking her there.

MIL "appears" to have little self awareness and often puts her own needs and desires above everyone else. I think she's being selfish, she doesn't need to parade these photographs and talks of Disney Land to a very hopeful DD. She's making us look mean for not taking her there.

What should I do?

Well no, she doesn't need to keep going on about it. But unless you are going to keep your child in a cupboard, this is the start of understanding not everyone can do or have the same things. If you can't afford it, just tell dc you won't be going. DC often hope for things, doesn't mean they will get them.

Tell MIL to pack it in, how bizarre - has your DH spoken to her about how irritating this is?

It’s one thing to be an age where she’ll start to be aware of these kind of places but rubbing her nose in the fact you’re not going to be able to take her is cruel.

Do you think your MIL is laying the ground to ask to take your DC there herself when circumstances permit?

I think she's basically bragging rather than rubbing her nose in it. "Look what a great Mum I was all those years ago!" She really likes to brag. She doesn't think/doesn't care about how this impacts on the feelings of others.

Of course DD will learn that there are things some children have and she doesn't, I really believe in resilience in kids. But I don't think MIL ought to be parading the fact before she even really understands that there is such a place.

DH spoke to her previously, but clearly, MIL has "forgotten." 🙄

She soumds horremdous and like my mil

Literally your dh needs to call her out and challenge it.
"Why are you doing this?"
"you are upsetting your GD and me and my wife by teasing and bragging to a child about luxuries I can't afford to her. How do you think that makes her feel and how do you think it makes me feel?"
"Don't you care it upsets her?"

And i would sharply reduce contact

Just tell your DD the truth.
Disney holidays cost an awful lot of money.

Apparently they're renovating the castle so you can't see it and also all the shows have been postponed, no characters, parades, buffets etc. (I booked before the pandemic and have postponed 4 times now!) Maybe point out the above to delay the conversation for a few more years until she's too old to go...!

But for a cheaper (imo better) alternative have you heard of Efteling?!

Ooh I would lay it on thick when the albums come out "oh yes DD! Isnt it lovely! Granny will take you soon, won't you MIL?"

Actually I think this is really mean to you and your child of it really is that in your face . I would just leave if she gets the albums out ,initially making an excuse and hope she gets the hint, samt to the bringing it up too much.