I have a friend I met through a shared hobby a year ago. He has some learning disabilities.
He has a dc with his ex wife, he pays maintenance and enjoys seeing the dc regularly. However, over time I and another friend have noticed that his exW may be financially and emotionally abusive towards him. For example, she regularly asks for extra money from him (over the divorce agreement) and says he can't see dc if he doesnt pay. She goes into his flat and looks at his bank statements. If there is money then she will again, ask for more. This is despite him paying her more than is required by the divorce agreement and online calculator.
He has hardly any possessions and could file for bankruptcy, he has built up loan/credit card debt through paying his own bills and giving her money.
He goes into emotional meltdown when she gets angry with him. I've been with him when she does this over the phone, he becomes very upset and desperate for her to become 'happy' again.
All his behaviour in allowing her to do this appears really odd to me, as someone not with his situation. I know he had additional help as a child due to his learning difficulties but he doesn't seem to get that now, he's quite isolated. He believes her (non-sensical) threats and quotes them as gospel (eg I have to pay her more money because she said if she takes me to court they will agree with her) - he cant see that she's manipulating him, or is scared to admit it.
Is there anything that can be done to help him? Another friend and I have tried to explain to him but he gets defensive/closes up, or sometimes he cries and says he's ruined his life being involved with her. He could be free of this, set some boundaries, not risk bankruptcy. He needs to be willing to help himself though, any ideas?