Have NC for this, as might be outing for those concerned.
A friend of mine wants to end his long term relationship (I've not quizzed him on why but he is patently unhappy, constant bickering and arguing, etc.) and has tried and tried to discuss with his partner that he would iike to leave.
She listens, agrees to the terms of their separation, and then acts as though the conversation never happened. So he raises it again, they agree (he thinks) that he will move out, how they will work things out (children involved), and then it's as though the conversation never happened. It's been going on for months. He wants to leave on some kind of good terms (i.e. not just walking out) but she won't recognise that he actually wants to end things.
I think it sounds a bit manipulative, and it's designed to keep him feeling confused and stop him from leaving. I've some experience of a long-term EA relationship myself, and this sort of gaslighting was one of the tactics employed against me.
However, I'm worried that this could be colouring my experience and I'd just like to be able to offer some constructive, impartial advice. I know from experience that dealing with somebody manipulative is completely different to dealing with a "rational" person, but i don't want to assume that everybody else's experiences are like my own.
Just want to be supportive - reading up on manipulative behaviours was very helpful for me, and I'm wondering if sharing some fot he resources I found would be useful for him. But obviously not if this is actually perfectly normal behaviour!