Backstory:
I ma a single mum of 3 kids, no family living near me, kids dad has inconsistent contact, his family don't bother with the kids at all. During lockdown 2 I made a support bubble with a friend who has 2 kids. She is DD2 godmother and she was actually my birth partner with DD2 as situation with exwas bad at the time.
Anyway, DD2 had her bday just before New year's eve, so friend came over for cake and kids to play as she was my support bubble. Next day a family member of hers whom she saw on Christmas day was ill, they had covid, she started feeling ill as well, got tested and also had covid. As a result I had to self isolate for 10 days but thankfully we were OK.
She was quite ill with covid but she is OK now. As a result of the experience she said she d rather only meet outdoors for the foreseeable, as she does suffer from anxiety. Very understandable, so we agreed on that. We then didn't since last time I saw her as she had another period of self isolation after seeing her mum who then tested positive for covid, as well as freezing temperatures prohibiting outdoor meetings.
So here comes the issue.
Group chat with her me and friend C, she send s a msg about being able to see mutual C's house from the sofa of D's house (D being a friend of hers).
I am obviously surprised she is at D's house so query it and she says she is in a support bubble with D... And I am like I thought u were my support bubble???
Her reply.. "Oh I thought I told u, I couldn't be,. Its because my partner says its too risky as your kids still go to nursery and they might give us covid"
And no, she did not tell me about this, if she had I would had taken kids out from nursery in order to see her, as the support bubble was very important to me.
She did not apologise or say anything other than repeating I thought I told you. Like who the fuck is unsure if they had such a conversation, is not a n easy to forget topic. Not to mention, she did just have covid which I could have caught from her, but she is worried we might give it to her? And also she literally just had it, the chance of catching it again is ridiculously small, studies suggest you should be safe from catching it again for at least a few months.
I had an extremely emotional response, so instead of saying any of those things, I felt utterly betrayed, removed her from group chat and blocked her.
I just felt like she should have talked to me, and its so disrespectful and uncaring to just drop me like that and not say a word. Was she planning to avoid seeing me and not tell me that she had a new bubble?
So MN tell me please, have I been unreasonable in my response? Should I try to talk this out or should I let this friendship go for good?
Not sure if relevant info but
1.friend is very confrontation avoidant, in restaurants I had to return her food when we found hair in it cause she was too anxious to do it, so dunno if she manufactured this whole thought I told u as a way to avoid the confrontation
2.if she had spoken to me about it I would have offered to stop nursery in order to keep the bubble
- If she still didn't want to be in a bubble with me I would have been sad but would have understood if she had spoken to me, my feelings of betrayal stem from not even speaking to me
- Friend C told her privately that she hadn't spoken to me about change of bubble, to which she changed the topic of conversation
5.friend has not made any attempt to talk to me, she is blocked on fb but she has my number and knows where I live so she could have spoken if she had wanted to.
6.support bubble was for both our benefits as she has a partner who works long ours and she has various health issues, I have often been her should to cry on when her anxiety is really bad or helped her with errands cause she was too anxious to go alone
Omg so sorry for the length of this!