Attraction

[starpatterns]

I've been single for about 3 years now after coming out of a very long term relationship.
Before lockdown I had a very brief thing with a man I had an amazing chemistry with. I'd never experienced this with my ex or any man before him. It was just a kiss but opened my eyes really to how things could be like.
Nothing will ever come of this situation, I don't believe he's into me in the same way- also I am not relationship material and I don't want to open myself to heartbreak again. I am committed to be single. But the thing is, I'm conflicted. It's almost as if this encounter messed things up and is getting in the way of being happy on my own - I'm massively attracted to him to the point it makes me unhappy. Is it possible to live without it and how do you brush this feeling off? I really want to be happy and single

I think you are more afraid of getting hurt. Being in a relationship doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your independence too it's possible with the right relationship. If you close yourself off from love then you are missing out on all the good, we cannot control how others treat us only how we deal with it.

You will either have to go for it and take the risk and consequences or you will have to let time do its thing and you will eventually stop thinking about him. Or if you do think about him it will be less intense. I think the fact it happened before lockdown has probably made it worse. You have no other distractions and far too long to dwell on the fling. It is quite easy to have amazing chemistry with someone you don't really know. It is all so new and exciting but it doesn't actually mean anything.

Thank you for your replies. I'm in my 40s and never felt like this about anyone.
A lot of men I've liked have gone off me quickly and disappeared. He said stuff which I think were probably lies too. I feel very wary about it all.