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Original poster

Can ex move another lady into family home whilst we still jointly own it?

29 replies

Fightingback16 · 16/02/2021 09:47

Another question Sorry.

House due to me transferred to me via court order in 2 weeks. I fled it due to DV. Was originally a house in my family before jointly owing with him.

I bumped into a neighbour who told me he moved another lady in months ago.

Never disclosed that on the court forms, not bothered tho. More bothered that all my possessions are in there and in 2 weeks he has to hand it back.

Should he have moved her into the house?

OP posts:
StephenBelafonte · 16/02/2021 09:49

He was probably hoping to be able to stay in the house. Obviously they will both have to leave on the court appointed date.

sunnytimes83 · 16/02/2021 09:55

Of course, you can also invite any number of people to stay there too as your guests! Don’t do it tho x

converseandjeans · 16/02/2021 09:58

I don't know the legalities but morally that's wrong. I wonder if she knows it's your family home which you inherited? I would want to go and get my stuff out. I suppose you have to give him half the value?

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 16/02/2021 10:00

Ah ok so more of a moral than legal thing not to move in your lady when it’s still full of your ex wife’s belongings.

Also he has been ordered to attend a perpetrator of abuse course and hasn’t had access to his dd for 15 months, (still at court) all her toys in the house....what is this lady doing!

OP posts:
MiddleClassMother · 16/02/2021 10:04

Both of them will have to leave on the appointed day and hope your belongings are still in tact. It is a little strange to bring a new partner into the house that's got your ex wives possessions in (and your DD you have no contact with!)

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 16/02/2021 10:05

No he only was awarded 20% and paying him out so being transferred on the 3rd March via consent order.

OP posts:
Thisisworsethananticpated · 16/02/2021 10:07

Meh , the most important thing is he is leaving
See this as another nail in the coffin

I wonder if this new lady is 100% aware of what’s so

I somehow bet she isn’t ...

Well done on ending it

Arrivederla · 16/02/2021 10:08

Have you spoken to your solicitor about this? If not, might be worth a quick email.

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 16/02/2021 10:08

I bet he's told this poor woman an utter crock of shit.

Have you got a plan of what to do on 3rd March if he refuses to leave?

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 16/02/2021 10:22

Ummm nope no plan yet. I guess it will go back to court. He signed the transfer papers yesterday so finger crossed!

OP posts:
Chanandlerbong01 · 16/02/2021 10:39

Sorry if this upsets you but are your sure your belongings are still there? If he’s not a very nice man is he likely to have just left them as they are?

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 16/02/2021 11:40

I took everything sentimental but the whole house is mine. My furniture passed down, my wallpaper etc. I expect it to be trashed but what can I do but wait till the 3rd.

OP posts:
Marineboy67 · 16/02/2021 11:43

It is upsetting but ultimately you will have the upper hand and the last laugh. Whilst our last house was on the market my ex-wife had a bloke in there enjoying everything in the half million pound house I worked on my life for. Yes its gutting & makes you feel wretched but this time will pass soon enough. Wish you well.

TossaCoinToYerWitcher · 16/02/2021 11:53

@MiddleClassMother

Both of them will have to leave on the appointed day and hope your belongings are still in tact. It is a little strange to bring a new partner into the house that's got your ex wives possessions in (and your DD you have no contact with!)
My and her new partner were quite happy to live that way for over a year. The house is now in her name (she bought out my share) and I’ve now got the possessions I wanted, but they’re still sleeping in the bed and sheets we bought together, with pretty much the same furnishings, sentimental ornaments, etc. He’s literally living long-term in a relic of our marriage. Personally, I like to redecorate a place as soon as it’s practical, but some people just aren’t that sentimental about such things.
stealthninjamum · 16/02/2021 11:54

I would post in legal and/ or see a solicitor as I think as you might need to get her to agree to move out? I vaguely remember when I lived with my mum and we moved house when I was about 21, even though I was at university, I had to sign papers to say I would move out and not be a squatter. I can’t remember the details.

RuledbyASD · 16/02/2021 12:08

I would go round there when he's likely at work and make sure she fully understands the situation. That it is YOUR house and that she's aware they both need to leave on the 3rd. I also wouldn't knock!

MrsWindass · 16/02/2021 12:50

@Marineboy67

It is upsetting but ultimately you will have the upper hand and the last laugh. Whilst our last house was on the market my ex-wife had a bloke in there enjoying everything in the half million pound house I worked on my life for. Yes its gutting & makes you feel wretched but this time will pass soon enough. Wish you well.
It's interesting that you see it as your house that you had worked for ? Did your wife not contribute to your life and work ?
VettiyaIruken · 16/02/2021 12:53

Can you go to the court and ask that the house be inspected for damage on the day he leaves before the money is transferred to him?
I'm not sure if they do that but it's worth asking your solicitor if it's a possibility.

Cherrysoup · 16/02/2021 13:07

Can you go round and retrieve anything super valuable? Take someone with you or advise the police that you will going and your ex may kick off?

Marineboy67 · 16/02/2021 13:35

MrsWindass: If you read what I posted I said 'Our House' and yes I did pay every penny that bought that bought the house. I couldn't have done so without my ex looking after our children and therefore I referred to it as our house. That being our joint contribution.
That said it still hurts to see another man or woman enjoying the pleasure of everything you've worked for. So what's interesting about that please explain?

MrsWindass · 16/02/2021 15:15

@Marineboy67

MrsWindass: If you read what I posted I said 'Our House' and yes I did pay every penny that bought that bought the house. I couldn't have done so without my ex looking after our children and therefore I referred to it as our house. That being our joint contribution. That said it still hurts to see another man or woman enjoying the pleasure of everything you've worked for. So what's interesting about that please explain?
in the half million pound house I worked on my life for This is what is interesting - that YOU worked all? your life for .

At least now you have added to this with I couldn't have done so without my ex looking after our children

Yes I agree about her having someone else there but I dislike the fact that originally it seemed to be that you were the only one who had worked for it.

bombastical · 16/02/2021 15:18

Oh wow OP. Go and let yourself in when he’s not there. Go and collect stuff. If she’s there you can say your piece. Not long until you get it back and can get on with your life 👍

Itsjustmilk · 16/02/2021 15:28

Isn't there a bit on the financial consent forms submitted to court where both parties have to say if they are planning on co habiting with someone else in the near future? Did your ex lie to the courts about this maybe?

Marineboy67 · 16/02/2021 15:31

MrsWindass there is no 'seemed' about it, I did work all my life to pay for the house. The point is the upset that causes seeing someone else enjoying it. I happily acknowledge my ex wifes contribution to that. Put yourself in the OP 's shoes you'd hate it to.

SeasonFinale · 16/02/2021 15:34

Mrs Windass - why are you picking at Marineboy67's wordings? I suspect because he is male and if another female poster had poster the same comment you would not have had an issue. Of course it works both ways. Noone is going to like seeing a new partner in their former matrimonial home with their ex-partner male or female.

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