My partner and I of 2 years had this whirlwind romance. It was everything I had ever wanted and more. We had all the elements required to have a healthy and great relationship and it was generally the happiest time of my life, he was and still is the love of my life. But we hit some unforeseen troubles, mental health issues etc quite early on (as well has lockdown) which means we didn’t get to fully experience the ‘honeymoon period’. This has caused the dynamics of our relationship to change, there’s also quite a bit of water under the bridge because the troubles we went through, and we seem to (I say we as it appears kinder) but it is largely him, lost sight of what we used to have and doesn’t treat me or our relationship with as much attention, importance or care as he did before.
We seem to have lost the ability to communicate without arguing and there’s a lot of distance between us. Don’t get me wrong, we are still very much in love, and do have fun together, and the sex is still regular, but the passion, attentiveness, general overall effort and his interest isn’t where it was. He is much more interested in his phone, doesn’t seem to want to talk about the future anymore, takes hours to respond to my messages, shirks off my compliments...the list goes on. It just makes it hard because I am still very much in love and I know he love me, just he doesn’t show it as much as I would like him too. Equally I don’t want to force him to do something he doesn’t feel, I don’t want anything to be contrived.
I told him I was unhappy last week, and I almost felt bad for doing it. He told me he needs time to think about everything as he was upset and said his head was all over the place. He is going to phone me today. I am so nervous as I don’t know what he is going to say. Part of me feels it’s over, and like I’m waiting on him confirming it. But on the other hand, we’ve had so much tension and fights lately I don’t think either of us has it in us to do anything right now, perhaps a break would be best to gather our thought and have some space. I worry that this will push us further apart though and I don’t really want to be without him, but I also don’t want to feel unhappy and constantly feel second best in his life.
Anyone got any success stories from taking time out? Has it worked in your favour?