Suspicious wife trying to get her ducks in a row

[StarCourt]

I know it's only The Mirror but I've just read this

Man sues wife for 'opening bank statement to see if he was having an affair' www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/man-sues-wife-opening-bank-23474009

"Missuse of private informantion", interesting !.

Isn't it and so
Much advice on here telling women to do exactly what's in the article

You definitely cannot go opening other people's private correspondence! You can do it with permission, eg if you've been given online banking password etc. But just opening someone else's mail is totally not ok, ever. I'm shocked that people on here get advised to do that.

I’ve never seen people here advised to open other people’s mail or emails to get financial information.

I’ve never seen people here advised to open other people’s mail or emails to get financial information.

Me either. I would imagine from reading the articles about it she wasn't wrong in her assumptions though.

I've never seen anyone on here advising to open post.

I think the key point in that article for me is that she forwarded either the bank statements themselves, or the information therein, to a financial advisor, presumably to give her an advantage in settling division of assets. Totally shot herself in the foot there. If she'd kept her mouth shut there would have been no case.

It sounds like she's been very badly advised / let down by her lawyer.

I’ve seen lots of previous posts which advocate getting as much financial information together as possible (which, to me, would include getting hold of copies of accounts or bank statements).

I’ve not seen anyone specifically say “open his post,” but she’d accessed emails and other electronic information which were personal to him, and you see a LOT of posters recommending that people snoop on emails and texts, WhatsApp messages etc.

The biggest factor in whether you’d be caught up like she was, would be whether your stbex has the money to pursue such an expensive court action. He spent £90k bringing this before the judge and only got 60% of his costs back.

That’s a hell of a lot of money he had to burn for nothing much more than the satisfaction of financially hurting her. Bet their lawyers loved it though.

I remember my dad trying to push my mum down the stairs for opening his post. I wouldn’t bat an eyelid if DH opened mine.

The outcome of this case seems all wrong to me. Surely full disclosure is a requirement so why does it matter who opens the bank statement. A forensic accountant would be able to track down this information also. Or, am I missing something?

A forensic accountant can only (legally) go through material that’s publicly accessible. Without a court order, or the permission of the company or individual they’re looking at, they can’t just go on a fishing expedition and access anything they like.

The verdict was absolutely spot on. She was lucky that the judge didn’t make her pay more of his legal costs.

I'd say that she was lucky not to get stuck with more of the costs.

There is a lot of advice on here that encourages women to undertake behaviour that could well be illegal when they are in the process of ending a relationship. As can be seen in this case, it ends up benefitting no-one but the lawyers really.

Getting your ducks in a row means being prepared for the end of a relationship it doesn't mean trashing another person's privacy and dishonestly and illegally gaining and using private information about them to your advantage.