Gut feeling

[2021vibes]

I had a very strong gut feeling that my dp was lying about something, you always hear trust your gut trust your gut. I just couldn't let it go, it was such a small thing but that wasn't the point, I just had a feeling he was lying.
So I ended up saying later on how I felt and he ended up going out of his way to prove him self with photo evidence! So I was wrong.
So weird I don't know why I got that feeling I'm not an overly suspicious person or have any trust issues or anything. Now I'm really doubting my gut as obviously it does get it wrong at times.
Disappointed in my gut I was always trusting it up until now!!

Ok what’s your question?

I never really understand the whole trust your gut thing. Many people are insecure, paranoid, jealous, whatever. The last thing they should be doing is trusting their gut.

Not really got a question just sharing for opinions on the gut thing and maybe others have experienced similar!

Research suggests there may be neuropsychiatric conditions being triggered by Covid.
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7236749/

Sometimes ‘trust your gut’ turns out right and other times not.
We hear more about the first type of instances as the other ones don’t get mentioned or are dismissed/forgotten.

Humans don’t have magical senses.
‘Gut’ is just in our heads.
And of course - part of it is brain trying to make sense of actual information/clues in front of us.
But also - our mental state comes to it - and insecurities, anxieties, other issues also come to influence it all.

Don’t worry about your ‘gut’. Just try to look at things as objectively as you can

Could it be a misplaced suspicion? So, he proved you wrong on this particular issue but could he be lying /deflecting about another thing?

Are you normally insecure? I don't mean that unkindly, just trying to work out if this feeling is a regular thing for you.

@StarFriend

Could it be a misplaced suspicion? So, he proved you wrong on this particular issue but could he be lying /deflecting about another thing?

Are you normally insecure? I don't mean that unkindly, just trying to work out if this feeling is a regular thing for you.

That's a good point about misplaced suspicion. He might just have got lucky with the photo evidence thing.

I find that I have irrational 'gut feelings' when I am very anxious. Also my DH felt this too when he was under pressure lately. Therefore it is always wise to stop and think objectively about the situation before it escalates.
What is the tangible evidence?
What is the likelihood of this belief actually happening?
Has it happened before?
How am I feeling in general? About myself?
Is it only this situation or are you feeling odd about more situations and relationships?
Take a few deep breaths and answer honestly. Remember that our bodies have an inbuilt fight or flight complex. If we are under stress/pressure it may misfire and anything/anyone who is threatening our peace of mind may be viewed as a threat and irrational thoughts may occur. This hyper or false awareness is a tool to feel in control and push perceived threats away.
Yes, we all have a level of intuition and our gut can alert us to threat but in a heightened emotional state it may misfire and paranoia and mistrust can occur.

@StarFriend

Could it be a misplaced suspicion? So, he proved you wrong on this particular issue but could he be lying /deflecting about another thing?

Are you normally insecure? I don't mean that unkindly, just trying to work out if this feeling is a regular thing for you.

I've honestly never felt anything like this before. He's never given me any reason to doubt him before either that I can put this on. I've no idea where it came from. I didn't have myself as insecure but tbh during this lockdown I've over thought alot of stuff and some could possibly come from insecurity.

It depends on what you are thinking.

For example at the moment I'm involved and dating a man who is clearly still carrying a torch for his ex. My gut sensed it the first week we got talking. Because he told me about her like it was vital I knew about them. But then because of knowing that I started looking into things which made me "paranoid" like her Facebook, their old pictures etc. I was feeding my anxiety.

Then I started to relax because he took her photos off his house walls. We moved on. Had a tiny row a couple of weeks ago. The pictures were back up in his latest pictures. My gut is now telling me that he's not over her at all. So I'm sort of torn.

I think we just know and can pick up on little subtle things sometimes and we are right. But we can also feed our own insecurities by looking for things and making our fears bigger.

I guess ask yourself what was making you Have doubts. Have things happened before with him? Or your past? Are you insecure because of something? Those sorts of things.