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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Handhold please.. abusive DP

7 replies

Anyonelikemearound · 09/02/2021 00:51

I made a thread earlier today in the hopes of getting some things off my chest about DPs behaviour but it didn’t get any attention and I also downplayed it.

Told DP tonight I wanted out unless things changed, huge argument and some of his most threatening behaviour yet. When he came in The bedroom to talk, he shut the door behind him which I thought was off. At one point he stopped, cracked his knuckles, made fists and walked towards me. Threatened to drag me out the house. Threatened to hurt my pets. Conversation ended with me apologising for everything I’ve done.

I can’t leave right now of my own accord. However he can kick me out and he knows it.

I used to judge people like this and I’ve become it, weak and stupid. I feel like I’m waiting for the day he just hits me And the waiting for it makes me wish it’d just happen already. I know that’s bad.

OP posts:
MrJollyLivesNextDoor · 09/02/2021 00:53

Why can't you leave of your own accord?

Do you have children?

Bluebell9 · 09/02/2021 00:53

What do you need to do to be able to leave? Are you working? Do you have DC?

Anyonelikemearound · 09/02/2021 00:57

No children. Unemployed because Covid crippled my work place, this led me to losing my house because rent arrears. So he offered me to move in, but I’m not a proper tenant so I have no right technically to live here. I have no money/savings, no family. I have pets so temp accommodation is a no go and I’d rather not do that

OP posts:
Anyonelikemearound · 09/02/2021 00:58

Less about getting out of here to be honest. I will do it as soon as I get a new job. It’s just Coping in the mean time Sad

OP posts:
MrJollyLivesNextDoor · 09/02/2021 01:02

Can't tell you how to cope with living in fear and misery I'm afraid

However if you leave you will remove both of those things from your life

Do you have any family you could stay with?

Happymum12345 · 09/02/2021 01:25

Find somewhere temporary for your pets to stay- cats/dog homes etc. Get out ASAP, waiting for violence is unacceptable. Nobody should live like this. Go to a woman’s refuge, a church- anywhere, but get out and get help. Life will get better Flowers

fannyFERNACKERPANN · 09/02/2021 01:32

What pets do you have

You'll get through this, you're not weak at all. You did what you had to do to keep yourself safe in the moment.

Your Dp is a cunt but obviously I don't have to tell you that

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