Been with DH 16 years and think our relationship followed fairly typical pattern - loads of sex at start, whole weekends in bed, really wonderful and exciting, inevitably slowed down to sort of twice a week ish I guess when moved in and first married, ground to a halt when had two sleep resisting kids and then picked up a bit. The thing is, they’re now 5 and 2 and sleep ok and really we have plenty of opportunity but he isn’t interested. I reckon average is monthly, sometimes more, sometimes less, I tend to initiate which is fine but I don’t like the fact it’s almost always me and tbh he genuinely seems to prefer telly or gaming. He’s working very hard and hates his job but he’s not depressed and has lots of fantastic energy for the kids who he is great with. I just feel a bit on the outside - like we’re sort of mates but not even really a mate he’d chose to hang out with let alone sleep with over his male mates who he games with online. I’ve brought it up but he either denies there’s an issue or makes an effort that is sweet but doesn’t feel that genuine and also I feel a bit humiliated essentially asking if he’s stopped fancying me. I do make an effort, nice lingerie, tan or whatever - I’m definitely bigger than when we first met but not insanely so and also still think I’m attractive. I suppose I’m just hoping this is a sort of lockdown, no energy, everyone bit flat phase and best not overthinking - has anyone been in same boat?