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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Was I wrong or is he being selfish?

14 replies

MrsSnape · 31/10/2007 16:58

A few weeks ago I found out that my favourite band is playing near us tomorow. I mentioned in conversation to my friend (also my ex) that I would love to have gone to see them but couldn't afford it.

Ex then suggested that we go and he buy the tickets. I gave the usual "no its ok, dont be silly" but he insisted as I have recently bought us two tickets for another show.

So I agreed but said not to buy the tickets yet as I didnt have a babysitter. 2 days later he phoned and said he'd bought 2 tickets .

I asked my mum if the kids could sleep there the night, She said she was busy but agreed to have them after 6.30pm. The show starts at 7pm. It will take us 1 hour to get there. I told ex. He was fine with it saying it didn't matter if we missed an hour of the show

Anyway I later had a better idea and asked the kid's other grandma...she only lives around the corner and said yes immediately. So I arranged for her to sleep here, this would mean we could leave at 5pm and get there in plenty of time.

I told ex and he didn't approve saying it was "better for everyone" if the kids slept at my mums. I said it wasn't better for my mum as she was actually quite busy, it wasn't better for the kids as they had school the next day and it wasnt even better for us as we would miss half the show. He then started asking what the sleeping arrangments would be as he couldnt sleep on the couch as he has a bad back. I dont believe this, he's a 26 year old bloke that has never complained of back problems before and anyway, surely a 50+ year old woman's comfort should come first? He then said he couldnt sleep on the couch anyway as he'd need a decent sleep due to the driving he would be doing.

What's he playing at? was I wrong to arrange for the kids grandmother to sleep here?

OP posts:
MrsSnape · 31/10/2007 16:59

p.s. should also add that we had already arranged for ex to sleep here as he lives miles away from me.

OP posts:
Dior · 31/10/2007 17:00

Message withdrawn

MrsSnape · 31/10/2007 17:02

What like though? the kids grandmother is not his mother btw, the kids are not his.

OP posts:
Dior · 31/10/2007 17:03

Message withdrawn

MrsSnape · 31/10/2007 17:05

I dont understand it, its blatently easier for everyone if ex MIL babysits...he's met her and they get on fine. All I can think is a) he was hoping to get his leg over or b) he is worried about her asking awkward questions

OP posts:
TotalChaos · 31/10/2007 17:05

Do you think he was hoping for a bit of erm action, and that's why he's a bit peeved that the coast isn't clear?

wannaBe · 31/10/2007 17:06

maybe he's hoping for a bit more than just staying over night to avoid the drive home iyswim and thought your xmil will spoil those intentions by being there?

Dior · 31/10/2007 17:06

Message withdrawn

Dropdeadfred · 31/10/2007 17:11

definitely hoping that you and he would get some action...why is he your ex?

MrsSnape · 31/10/2007 17:13

because he's not grown up enough to have an adult relationship! LOL

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 31/10/2007 17:15

well he obviously thought you were up for a leg over, after all it's practically a date and you were getting rid of the kids and he was allowed to sleep over and he had it in his head already that it would not be on the sofa...

RosaTransylvania · 31/10/2007 17:16

Clearly he thought he would be getting a post-show shag. And is peeved that it is now out of the question.
Good to have that cleared up ahead of time.

warthog · 31/10/2007 17:34

mrssnape, you broke up with him for the right reasons, and quite right so. i really think you should make a total break with this guy. he's always going to be an arse.

catsmother · 31/10/2007 21:16

Agree with everyone else. There's no other possible sensible explanation for him getting the hump over Grandma staying at yours. What an idiot.

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