Hello i posted a few months back re my husband and how i wanted to leave. One by one ive tried to address the issues i was having without bombarding him with everything at once. But im at breaking poing mentally struggling and dont know where to go from here or how to approach the subject when he thinks everything is fine
Today was my Grandads funeral and he didnt come he asked if i wanted him there because it meant we would lose 60 quid extra bonus this week he gets for working during the pandemic so didnt argue, but felt really like i could have used him there he knew it was early morning so expected to maybe have a message to see how i was tjis afternoon but nothing, i picked my son up who thsnkfully fell asleep in the car put him to bed when i got in and went to bed and cried husband came home a couple of hours latter at most son was still napping and said are you having a nap because i was in bed. .took him until about 90minutes later to actuslly say how are you or how did it go. I just said fine and im fine because i would have been there to support him and ask him how it went and texted to make sure he was ok when i knew it was over.
Am i being unreasonable to have expected a cuddle or that work for once wouldnt come first ?
The few problems i. Having atm are
- He has very poor basic hygeine - never brushes teeth and showers once a week. We discussed this many times and i have repeatiy asked is he scared of a shower. Said he would go after work every day and its yet to happen
- We barely have anything in common anymore i suspect due to lockdown we cant do our mutual intrest but struggling to find anything in common
- Used to have date nughts they are practically non existant
- When i had 2 days in hospital i came out and nothing had been done in the house he didnt even step up and look after our son he let my mum watch him.citing he starts work early and cant put him in the van- my mum stays a 5 mjnute drive away so an extra 10 mins in the morning to drop him off wouldnt have been too much
- Houseworks a chore sometimes he does loads sometimes he does nothing for weeka and when i say anything he says but i did this 1 thing.
- I feel like all he does is moan at DS hes only 18 months and feel like he constantly gives him into trouble
- He has no motivation to do anything. I guess he was born lazy but its getting to me now.
Sorry for the rant - am i being unreasonable to assume a little support and how can i try abd approach some of these topics - truthfully i dont know if im in love with him anymore but dont even know how to start a conversation with him. Im at my emotional whits end and ready to snap crying nearly every day and just drained