STB exh vandalising new partner's car

[Yourteaisgettingcold]

My marriage broke up because my STB exh had multiple affairs, he is currently on/off with the last one I found out about (and who ultimately caused the end of our marriage).

A lot has happened, and a lot has been done to me in retaliation at finally leaving, but now I've caught my ex keying my newish partner's car. We had suspected he did it once but now I've caught on camera (though not very clearly) him doing it again.

My ex and I share a child together whom he uses as a weapon and whom I'm having psychotherapist sessions to help manage the emotional blackmail my ex applies to our child. My ex shows all signs of being a narcissist.

I met my new partner almost a year after I split from my husband, he is the nicest person and does not deserve to have his property vandalised.

I don't know what to do. Shall I log this with the police so there's a record? Just keep my own records in case its needed in future? I worry so much about any repercussions on me/my child if I do but my ex can't just continue doing whatever he wants when things don't go his way.

What would you all do?

Yes of course you should report him, particularly if you have video evidence. But it should be your new partner doing it (because it’s his car anyway and also the “blame” for doing so isn’t on you directly).

You should try not to live in fear of your ex. If he senses he can get away with it then the behaviour will just escalate.

Log it with the police and honestly I’d move.

Definitely report it.

The owner of the car needs to report the criminal damage to the police and press charges.

Your DP should report it.
Your ex sounds like a nasty bully, they often need to be stood up to. He must know he crossed a line into illegality, getting away with it will not help matters.

I'm no expert but it sounds like he might be heading towards injunction territory.

Report it to the police; you can’t really just log it, you/your partner needs to report it as criminal damage. If he gets away with it what stops him just doing more because he knows you’ll do nothing.

Yes absolutely report it to the police, without hesitation.

My problem is that the video i have doesnt 100% prove my ex did it but m DP and I both know it was him because of where and when the new scratches appeared.

I can't move just yet as that's all part of the divorce, trust me, I would if I could.

Thank you all for your advice and thoughts. I will speak to my DP tonight. I'm just so worried that this will lead to my ex doing something else to hurt me/our child.

Get some cctv up that will give you better footage - police will be interested.. My exh made allegations against my then bf and police took it seriously.. Until the facts came out. The station apparently laughed over a cuppa..
Exh had cited assault..
In actual fact my teen ds had thrown a water bomb at him!! Exh made a statement and identified a man with a beard. Imo he should have been charged with wasting police time.
Genuine crimes need reporting.

I'm going to try my best to convince my DP to report my stb exh. I know he worries about any repercussions but I'm sure I will be able to explain that he won't stop till we stand up to him.

Also looking into cameras this afternoon.

Thank you all again, really appreciate it.