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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband won’t listen to me

1 reply

PeggySue2 · 28/01/2021 17:29

My marriage is hanging by a thread.

One major issue for me is the impact of my husband’s work related stress on our relationship and our family. This has been going on for a couple of years. Whenever it comes up he always switches it round to say that it’s my fault because I’m not supportive enough and we never get anywhere, for example with finding ways to help him cope better with the stress.

We are doing couple’s therapy and I raised the work stuff and he just said that’s just her, she’s never happy with me, work’s just her latest thing to criticise. Basically the work is no problem.

I just don’t feel heard.

My question is this - is there anything I can do to get him to take on board my concerns?

I don’t want to end the relationship but it feels like i’m getting to the point where I’ll have no choice because he’s no willing to change anything.

(Appreciate it looks like I’m blaming him for everything in this and I’m not. I just think that issues on both sides need to be addressed)

OP posts:
MaMaD1990 · 28/01/2021 17:34

You say you're both in therapy and your DH has said it's another thing for you to criticise. Is this something you think is accurate or is it him turning the tables once again? It's a hard one because you can't make him change or deal with his stress. Have you asked him what he thinks will help his de-stress when you're both calm and not in front of a therapist? I suppose you have to think about how long your able to deal with this and if your happiness lays with leaving the partnership. Sorry this isn't terribly helpful!

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