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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My stupid stupid friend.

30 replies

AmberFloodWarning · 27/01/2021 22:23

She's daft. Very attractive, married and has been for a long time - not unhappy but not overly happy either. Her life is run on her husband's say so - not necessarily controlling but things are kind of set up to suit him.

She has become very close to a (10yrs younger, married) work colleague; he emails her occasionally and pops in to her office (she works alone in the office) daily for a chat. He makes all the running but she doesn't knock him back.
There's a strong mutual attraction and she says if neither were married and she were younger, she'd absolutely go for it.

So, she offered him her number because she didn't want anything showing on her work email.
He says he can't/won't contact her via his personal phone. He's happy to have contact but only on his work email, she's happy to have contact but NOT on her work email...

He just doesn't want his wife to possibly have the opportunity to find out what he's doing, does he? Hmm

I don't have an opinion either way re an emotional affair, that's up to her but I wonder if he's a bit of a player and hope it doesn't all end in tears.

OP posts:
Sssloou · 29/01/2021 01:51

Are you sure this is “a friend” OP? Or is it you?

1forAll74 · 29/01/2021 02:12

I would tell her to not inform you of her little flirty experiences. Why does she need to divulge to you,all her little dalliances. I assume that she is a grown woman, who can work things out for herself.

Theonethatgotawayawayaway · 29/01/2021 02:35

She’s flattered by the attention but she needs to stop now. I don’t really care how apparently ‘controlling’ her husband is to her OP, that’s up to her to leave him, I feel sorry for his poor wife if anything. Also have you ever thought if her marriage was so controlling etc, surely he’s more likely to see her personal phone?

You don’t have to fix anything. She’s playing with fire and she will get burnt but that’s her fault.

Twistered · 29/01/2021 08:46

Are you sure this is “a friend” OP? Or is it you?

I'm wondering this as well!
You're very invested for this being "a friend"

AmberFloodWarning · 29/01/2021 09:46

@Twistered

Are you sure this is “a friend” OP? Or is it you?

I'm wondering this as well!
You're very invested for this being "a friend"

Definitely not me. I am invested because I can see what's going to happen. She hasn't many close friends and it will be me helping her through it when it all goes pear shaped, regardless of whether it's her own fault for the mess she'll be in.

She's my friend and I care about her.

OP posts:
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