Ive been with my boyfriend two years. Both 40s, divorced, kids from previous marriages. Live apart with no plans to change this, half an hour drive from each other. We usually see each other one or two evenings a week, depending on work and kids, we message/call on other days.
Just before Christmas he was told he may be made redundant. Understandably he found this very stressful. I think the expected redundancy date is in about 4 months time.
He is really stressed and it is impacting our relationship. He sleeps badly and suffers headaches. He is more closed and has stopped smiling much, he can be a bit snappy and grumpy/demotivated.
I know this isn't my fault and tbf he is still loving, he seems to enjoy my company but is less enthusiastic, he seems to feel bad about not being able to spend money etc (we have always shared cost of days out etc, my job is secure).
I dont really know how to support him and help him feel better? He's not very talkative about the stress, he has said he feels bad we can't do 'fun' things anytime soon, like restaurants etc. He also feels worried about how he can support his kids (child maintenance) if he loses his job. Plus how he will pay his own rent if/when his role goes. He has been looking hard for jobs and saving money, but I can see his situation is crap and very stressful. If he took a minimum wage job then he wouldn't be able to pay his rent, let alone pay his ex wife/kids maintenance. Ex wife is very angry as she depends on his maintenance.
Sometimes he just seems distant and less communicative.
My own job is secure although I have been made redundant in the past, I know it is rubbish, must be even worse in a pandemic.