Working with husbands ex

[Spark80]

Hi guys, really hoping someone can give me some good advice please!
Me and my husband of 6 years both work for the same company, his ex also works here and sits only a few desks away from me. This wasnt a problem until we got engaged/married. Since then her work attitude towards me has changed, she's aggressive in her tone and tries to shut me down constantly in meetings. Ive got quite thick skin so have just tried to ignore her negativity but recently i have heard her making fun of me, the way i do my hair and make up, and calling me horrible names. I've asked my HR dept for advice but it was brushed away as she was "probably just joking". I'm at a total loss knowing how to approach this, the thought of going in to work each day fills me with dred now. I've told my husband everything thats been happening but he hasn't given me any advice other than to speak to HR.
Please help!

Talk to her and ask her politely to stop. If that doesn’t work go to her boss. Keep a note of dates/times/what happened. You may have a bullying grievance. I’d also put in writing to HR a summary of your discussion and the outcome.

Go back to hr and talk about bullying in the workplace and their duty of care.

I'd be looking for another job in another company to be honest, it doesn't sound like she's going to be out in her place by HR or stop her behaviour

Definitely don't go looking for another job that's exactly what she wants. She's clearly a bit pissed because she thought perhaps you guys weren't for real or forever. The getting engaged/married thing has chucked a spanner in her box and now you've got the prize she's jealous and envious. By making it difficult for you she gets to 'level it up' a bit in her head. Bit surprised at your husbands feeble pathetic no balls approach. Like that's really supporting his wife! This little Miss Bully bitch needs taking down a notch or two. Call her out infront of everyone and say "What's the problem then? What have I done to you?" Naturally she will act up like there's nothing wrong and that's when you insist ' "Oh no this finishes today" at that point you can go out and discuss it and give her a chance to explain herself or as you say thats an end to it. It's the only way with manipulative bullies, you have to fire it back at them loud & clear. Bullies become so because others enable them leverage and it slowly but surely builds up. It takes it out of you to face up to them but in my experience it's the only way.

Keep a record of all incidents, dates, etc. I know someone who did this in full view of workplace bully. It soon stopped.
I'm a sarcastic cow so I would breeze into the office declaring, ' Any comments on my hair / face today? No, oh good. Let's get on with being professional then.'
Probably wouldn't be a good idea, but it would make me feel better.
Some great advice from pps. Stand up for yourself.
Also, you don't say how you get on with others in the office? Start building good relationships with them, so they dont feel the need to take sides.