OLD during a pandemic, nightmare

[threesteakspam1]

Hi!

Thought I’d try my luck with OLD and I’ve been speaking to a few guys who seem to be really nice and up my street. But the same thing keeps happening. There’s been 2 guys that I’ve been texting, having interesting long conversations over text - planning a first date/meet up - one of them I have FaceTimed a couple of times and it went well. However with both of these guys they’re slowly going off the radar and replying slower and slower.
There’s also another guy who is really nice and fun to text but keeps saying he’s “not keen on virtual dates” and refuses to FaceTime, phone call, even do Netflix party because he “can’t multitask”, and it’s so difficult because I didn’t sign up for a pen pal but we can’t do anything in person!

It’s really frustrating and I keep feeling like I’m doing something wrong, as each guy keeps doing a slow fade.. but then I’m thinking if we have no idea when we can even meet, is it that they just don’t see the point in texting for weeks? And to not get to know each other fully before we even meet? What’s everyone’s perspective on this - and are there any guys out here that feel similarly and have put a back burner on texting girls from OLD?

Thanks!

I’m going to say the fact you can’t meet is a good thing, means they aren’t after 1 thing and they have to put the effort in.

Hmm interesting, because both guys started off so keen and seemed so lovely, great chat but now not putting in the effort/getting very slow at replying!!

This is really, really common in OLD, the majority of chats will fade out or not result in a date. Its usually because they are chatting to several at once and connect with someone else or they just get bored. I've chatted to many men online and most just fizzle out you will get used to it.

Definitely right! It’s tricky to know though because both were planning a date and were super keen before we got put back into lockdown so it’s hard to know if they’re just backing off because we can’t physically meet yet?

You've done well to hold conversations. Most are just matching and not talking.
Its a really difficult time to OLD without having the option to meet. It's a rubbish time to be single!

If they backed off when we went back into lockdown then you have your answer surely... they were hoping to find someone they'd be able to meet in person, they can't do that so they are putting things on hold. You might find they reappear when things start to open up again. It's understandable - it's really hard to think of having dates when you can't be anywhere near each other!

Definitely backing off because can't physically meet. Pick things up again when we're out of lockdown.

I've stopped dating too. I don't see the point when I know I can't meet them anytime soon. The alternative is chatting for weeks potentially getting invested and then being disappointed when or if we meet..
I just can't get excited about anyone knowing I can't meet them and the thought of doing a virtual date feels me with dread, it's bad enough doing millions of video calls for work.
I've decided to try and use the time to just do me, my rationale is if I try to get as healthy and happy as I can possibly be then when this is over I'll either be even more content to stay single or have a better chance of meeting someone I'm interested in anyway.

If you aren't going meet then there is no point.

Most of the ppl on online dating atm are either hoping to break lockdown or are there for the ego boost of talking to you for a bit.

And tbh you dont want to end up talking to someone for weeks and not meeting anyway because you wont be able to tell if they are timewasters or not. Or even if you fancy them.

I’d try again when meeting is allowed. There’s only so much chit-chat you can have with a complete stranger and still have if hold your interest, and definitely only so many times somebody can talk about how they are and how their day was and what plans they have for the rest of the evening when in lockdown.