Should I be upset or not

[shouldibesad]

I'm a little sad and need talking round. Been with my man a few years. He's lovely. I proposed to him on NYE and he said yes, bought ya both rings.

He hasn't seen the importance of the ring though - took it if to work, eat shower wash up etc.

And now only a few weeks later he's misplaced it. I don't earn a lot, I spent £200 on the ring which is a massive amount. And I bought my own - my choice.

I know it's just a ring but to me it's symbolic and I am a bit

Talk me round. He's lovely

If he's not used to jewelry then perhaps it's easy to misplace.

Do you get the sense he is hesitant to commit on a deeper level.

So, he lost his engagement ring?

Has he not said he's going to replace it? If he doesn't seem that bothered, I would be upset too.

My husband takes his ring off when doing the washing up, changing nappies etc. But he stupidly put it in his pocket once and it ended up down the couch mechanisms. We found it. But not before he’d been through the nappy bin hoping it had t fallen off the shelf above it. He might just be a man who doesn’t like rings or finds they get in the way for certain stuff or wanted to keep it good. But make him buy his own new one or give you the money anyway.

Did he want a ring or did you just buy them because you like the idea? I would never wear an engagement ring because I know I would damage or lose it. If DP were ever to buy me one, I’d ask him to either return it, or accept that it would stay in my jewellery drawer except for special occasions.

If he was keen to wear a ring then I think you’re right to be upset that he’s been so careless with it. Is he apologetic and upset himself? His reaction is important I think - if he’s just a bit “so what?” about it then I’d honestly be rethinking the engagement.

No I get it, I don't think he normally wears jewellery and he is bothered about finding it but you're right. I'm worried subconsciously he's not ready to commit.

I'd be had bought me an engagement ring then bloody hell I would have tried not to lose it in two weeks 😰

I lost my engagement ring. I took it off to wash dishes etc... And one of those times it got lost, somehow 30 years later we're still together.

My dad used to take his wedding ring off to wash his hands etc. It wasn’t because he didn’t like it or want it he just felt he couldn’t wash his hands with it on. He lost it on a french campsite about 35 years ago, managed to stay married all that time though!

Thank you guys... I feel bad as I can tell he's devastated. Again, he told me he wanted to keep it clean and safe. I guess as a girl I beg attached and sentimental 😰

Oh in the argument he did say though that he hated it. It was too big, broad and clunky. And that hurt. But hey. He got one 😀

He said he hated it maybe it wasn't an accident after all...

I threw my wedding ring in the bin, by accident, during a house move a few years ago. After 40 years of marriage. I haven't noticed any discernible change in my relationship. Marriages really aren't about the rings.

Do men usually wear engagement rings?

I don't wear jewellery and it took me ages to get used to my engagement ring

When you say “bought us both rings” Did you propose and give him a ring or did you both go out and buy rings together after you proposed.

I just wondered whether he wanted one, had been planning on proposing etc? I don’t know men with engagement rings so wasn’t sure if there was something else going on perhaps

Is it possible that he's a bit embarrassed about wearing an engagement ring? As it is primarily a woman who wears one and not the man (not that I think it's embarrassing by the way).

Did he wear it on his 'wedding finger'? Maybe he was conscious that most people would assume it's a wedding ring?

I wouldn't have bought an engagement ring for a man, period, but especially not for a man who doesn't wear or like jewelry.

My husband has lost 4 wedding/ engagement rings in the last 33 years. I now refuse to buy him another. Still married though.
I think he was probably trying to keep it clean and misplaced it.

When my grandmother died my dad gave me her wedding ring. I have worn it for years. It is very old and something I am proud to wear.
I gave it to my son. I wanted him to have it, he was pleased that i gave him something so precious to treasure and he promptly lost it.
He is sorry but it's gone and there is nothing we can do about it.
It's not worth getting in a flap over even though it is/was an important thing to pass on to a future generation

Here’s an outside thought - I get lots of jewellery as gifts. I fucking hate my engagement ring (long story).
I don’t wear it often (it’s a claw design so cut hurt my DD)
But never lost it, or indeed anything from washing up etc.
I suspect it’s a sign.
Sorry OP

Still don't understand why you bought your own (that has nothing to do with who proposed)

My brother is not a jewelry wearer at all but got a wedding ring. He just couldn't get on with it and used to fiddle with it and take it on and off, only wear it for special occasions etc over the first 4 years of marriage.

Until he lost it. Right before a family photoshoot.

He and I (wife at work, meeting us at the photo studio) had 30 mins to buy a replacement. We scooted into the jewelers, asked to see wedding rings around £X, hastily scanned the trays until he spotted the identical ring and said 'That one!' Paid and ran out of the shop - no doubt leaving the assistant reeling from the romance of the situation...

He has worn that ring constantly for the last 25 years.

The ring is not the marriage, or the engagement, but it does sound as if your fiiancee a) is not a ring person and b) he had no say in the ring you bought him since he hates it - how did that happen?