Divorce

[MK42]

Hi,
Does anyone know any good divorce solicitors out there? And what is the likely cost? How long does it take?
I am male and I really would like shared responsibility for my two children- not seeing them everyday will be difficult enough, but I want them to have as good an experience of having a separated Mum and Dad as they can. In people's experience- how likely is this?
Life very difficult right now. Sharing house with my soon to be ex-spouse and she is not coping with lockdown. Trying to support her as a fellow human being as much as I can, keeping her 'up' as much as I can, whilst also making our kid's lives as normal as possible. I am still working full time, but I a seriously want just curl up in a ball and cry my eyes out. Also trying to keep my staff going too, who are finding this all difficult too. My wife is in constant anger mode and says that her life would be perfect if it were just her and the kids, and that I am the problem. She is constantly aggressive (though this was toned down over Christmas) and shouts at me (though she says that it is not shouting). If I ask her to stop, or point it out that she is shouting, she tells me I am imagining it and gets more angry. She says that everything about me irritates her. This is the most isolated and lonely I have ever felt in my whole life. The house was going on to the market, but we decided against that as telling the kids would break their hearts and houses aren't selling in our area right now. Trapped basically. Please tell me it gets better eventually. Any advice about costs/solicitors gratefully accepted.

Sorry you're feeling down - it us hard to live with someone you're splitting with. I've done it until recently and it can be soul destroying.If you look for a family solicicitor in your area they normally offer half an hours free advice.

You could also research on the internet do it yourself divorce which is much cheaper than using a solicitor. If you both agree on terms for after you split that is much better and less costly obviously,but you would need to agree your terms with your ex.

The best way to start is to make a list of how you want things to be when you separate - are you looking at buying another property or renting? How much money will you need? Where do you want to live? Could one of you afford to buy out the other's share? List all you assets, savings, pensions.

Realistically what days/weekends could you have the children around your work etc. Some people have their children 50/50 and then you would not need to pay any costs for your children's care to your ex as you will have your children 50 % of the time.

It sounds as though it may be difficult for you to agree with your wife as to how things will look in the future due to her hostility. If you could agree on these things it may be you could get a financial legal agreement put in place for your both which is about £500 normally but it sounds as though this may be difficult for you due to your wife's hostility. If that's the case then you would be better to see a solicitor for advice.

Do you have a family member you could stay with temporarily for the sake of your mental heath temporarily to give you time to think? If your name is on the mortgage she cannot keep you out of your joint property.

This will be a difficult emotional time, you need to look after yourself and eat properly and don't be afraid to talk to friends or family for support.

Thanks for the response celticmissey. No, I have no family members I could stay with. This literally is the only place I have, and with COVID going on, I'm not sure I could anyway. Thanks again, and have a great weekend.