Does anyone have very little contact with their coparent?

[BeenHereAllDay]

NC as I don't want this linked to my normal username.

We use My Family Wizard due to our contentious relationship, but I still get ridiculously long and drawn out messages relating to homeschooling on the app where my coparent is trying to come across as 'reasonable' but is actually just trying to manipulate me. He is a bully but thinks he is the kindest person on the planet.

It doesn't help there is a pretty horrible divorce going on at the same time, neither of us can afford solicitors so whilst on one hand i'm getting these MFW emails full of saccharine over the top niceties, I'm also getting some awful emails to my personal account, you know the kind where they level loads of accusations at you to in order to get a larger settlement. I am hoping these will come to an end soon as as of next week we will either be going to court or settling.

I plaster a smile on my face for my 9 yr old, but this has been going on such a long time, and with lockdown and homeschooling I am beyond emotionally depleted.

Does anyone have any experience of completely cutting their coparent out of their lives, and what affect did this have on their children? My LO comes first always, but I'm getting to a point where I'm thinking, is that by taking care of my own mental health? And is cutting this person completely out of my life the best way to do that?

I am at the end of my tether today. Does this get better?

There's a compromise solution called Parallel Parenting I tried when I divorced: www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/co-parenting-after-divorce/201309/parallel-parenting-after-divorce

I get where you're comig from though. I'd have loved to go competely NC, however it proved to be unfeasible. There's always things that come up about the kids health or schooling or just holiday arrangements that mean we were forced to interact, even if to a limited extent. Things have improved enough over the last few months, but that's mainly because my ex stopped making promises they never kept and putting their needs above the kids'.

I'm sure some people considered me "bitter" by withdrawing as much as I did, however it was less about holding a grudge and more - as you say - about protecting my mental health.

In my case, we broke up after my ex was unfaithful and she continued to lie, deflect and gaslight even after we broke up. To use an analogy, if someone punches you in the face and doesn't apologise, staying away from them is common sense - no one would seriously suggest you're just "bitter" about being assaulted.