How much is fair to take from partner

[clix]

My partner and I Intend to move into my home . I own it outright and have my two children with me 75% of the time while the eldest is at Uni and comes home
Sporadically . He has a child whom he sees eow and for hols . He will have his own room as he has sn and refuses to share . My partner and I do not know what is fair in terms of contribution to rent/ bills and food . Any suggestions please? We both earn equally but I want to keep my home Solely in my name for my children, right now.He is very happy with this decision until our children are grown up and leave the nest, so to speak which will be ten years maximum.thanks .

I'll never marry again!!!
Once bitten etc. This is why I'm
Trying to be as careful with my children's inheritance as possible aswell
As having a lovely equal life with my
Partner

@BackwardsGoing

I'd split bills with him appropriate to the cost of your respective children. You will both be better off and he could possibly save to help provide a joint deposit on your next home together.

He will be in a precarious position because he has no rights to stay in your home should you split up. You could kick him out at a moment's notice. So a good buffer for him would be to have c. 6 months rent in cash savings.

This what me and DP do. We live in a house he owns. He recognises my precarious position so would rather I saved for our shared future than pay him rent he doesn't need.

He's got to pay you for use of his sons bedroom, especially as it's going to be left empty most of the time, it's a room you could otherwise be using. Will your kids mind that his kid's taking over an entire room, you're not going to make them share to facilitate this are you?

There are two adults each with an income. So they should equally split all bills for food, power, CT, shared holidays, and daily home cleaning and maintenance (window cleaner, laundry liquid, emergency plumber when dishwasher leaks).
That equal split of common bills is regardless of which and how many children come and go.

The owner of the property pays for buildings insurance and any major renovations. Making it clear they have sole ownership responsibility.

Each parent decides and pays for their own childrens personal expenses like clothing, education, pocket money.

Depends where you live but if he's paying 700 a month could he not afford a small place of his own. While you're protecting your children's inheritance he's doing nothing for his by staying with you. It would be better for him to be accruing something for himself and his son.

I would get him to pay 50.50 for domestic bills. I would work out 700-that, and put the difference into a deposit for your shared property in an account in your name.
If you work = good deposit
If you split = some savings that you keep at the end

Would also not sell existing house if you buy together.
Rent it out and leave to your children in your will.

Rent money can either pay uni etc for your kids or pay off new joint mortgage

An early poster suggested splitting the mortgage 70:30.
This is terrible advice from a legal perspective (I have dealt with divorces and cohabitation disputes for over 25 years).
He should pay you a sum which it must be agreed is rent and contribution to bills and not a mortgage contribution. Do NOT use the mortgage as a reference point to calculate it, do not bring the mortgage into it at all.
He's effectively a lodger x1.5 (his DC has own room, he shares yours). I dont know where you are or how expensive your house/area is, but I'd use lodger rates as a starting point with a bit of an uplift to reflect the fact that he is saving on rent, plus 40% of the bills (he has 2 on his side, you have 3 plus an occasional 4th ). Plus the same percentage contribution to other regular expenses (eg food).

Rather than taking a rigid approach, work out what you think it will be and agree a global monthly sum which you will both pay monthly into a joint account. Review it after 3 months in case you under or over estimate and then annually.

You can set all this out in a simple cohabitation agreement.

Now here is the tricky part. As time goes on, the boundaries will become blurred. Reviewing the figures annually will come to feel awfully mercenary and transactional when you are supposed to be in a living, committed relationship. Things may slide. He may contribute to household improvements and this MAY give him an interest. In a committed relationship it is always tricky to
deal with these in a "commercial way" (eg by you insisting you must pay for improvements to avoid him acquiring an interest). In an ideal world you would record subsequent departures from the original agreement and what the new intention is. But real life gets in the way and this often falls by the wayside.
The only way to protect yourself completely is never let him contribute to anything, other than rent and bills contribution.

So sorry, missed your post about no mortgage, so ignore that part of my advice, but the rest is valid.

When you eventually buy together recording your respective ownership relative to your contributions is very easy, the conveyancing solicitor can draw up a deed of trust legally recording in what proportions it is owned.

So you've no mortgage payments, just for and bills?

Is there room for him to have his own room or is this putting your children out?

I'd say 1/3 of the bills and then a rough idea of how much extra he'll cost in food. When his DS is there he can buy any specific for he'd want.

Following questions might be useful to help you clarify your own views: When you say you "own your property outright" do you mean debt-free, or is there still a mortgage to pay? You say you want to keep the property in your name for your children right now, and your partner is happy with that for the next 10 years - what are your intentions then? If it were me, I would pay the property related costs on my own; let my partner support the relationship by paying other costs of living, and protect himself by setting up a completely separate savings vehicle into which he puts the same amount as his current mortgage/rent and property costs. Clean division.

Food and bills and contribution to savings account?

I'd be cautious about charging him rent, you will need to declare this to HMRC as taxable income, not sure if you file a tax return atm.

My husband used to be a live in carer (for a couple of years) and was paying 'rent' to the person he looked after. Found out they hadn't been declaring it and were billed/fined £26,000 by HMRC...

Looking at the people living there and the times I would say 40% of the annual bills is more than fair.
Anything more and he will be paying for the upkeep of you and your kids.

My partner lives in my house. He pays 50% of all bills, nothing towards the mortgage or house repairs. This is to ensure he has no claim on my house. We were saving towards a bigger place together but have decided we actually really like my house and don't want to move so I've suggested he buys an investment property with his savings at some point in case we ever split.

He has definitely done better out of this whole arrangement but I earn significantly more than him so don't mind.

You should spend some money and get it written out legally he has no right to your home should you split whilst he lives there.

I would say 50/50 on bills and food etc.

But please protect your assets even if it costs some money to do so