A possible grower .. positive stories plz

[dilly123]

Been single for what seems like forever..
46 & a lone parent.. usually only attracted to arseholes & emotionally unavailable men, I've actually met a nice one. In fact he's lovely, funny, kind & so caring. It's early stages & so far just kissed.. I am attracted to him but not in a fireworks, butterflies in the tummy way. I smile to myself when he messages me but I don't think at the moment I want to rip his clothes off.. I am realistic that at our age perhaps we shouldn't expect to straight away feel like that & that feeling might grow because of how special he makes me feel.

Can anyone relate & give me positive stories of how their best relationships were more of a grower than an instant firework display? Please.. thank you

I thought you were going to say he had a cannabis farm 🤣

All I'd say is give it 6 months

I initially felt like this about the man I am now married to! I've had much more passionate starts to relationships, and I dithered for a long time as to whether I really liked him, but here we are, married for 5 years and with a toddler and baby on the way. He's a great guy, and I do love him. Sometimes it takes a bit longer to get there but that doesn't mean it's wrong 😊. As PP says, give it 6 months and see!

@Haggertyjane

I thought you were going to say he had a cannabis farm 🤣

All I'd say is give it 6 months

And I thought it was going to be something else

Right? grower, not a show-er

And I thought it was going to be something else

Me too

I thought you were going to tell us you finally saw his penis and was irrefutably disappointed, and wanted to know if he's a grower - NOT a show-er.

😂

I was going to say grower not a show-er but didn't want to be accused of click-bait... thank you for your replies.

Definitely going to give it a chance.. I think maybe some of it is my fear of letting someone in emotionally as opposed to superficial attraction.. I'm quite an ice maiden hopefully in time I will thaw out

Yes, I think that I knew my bf a year or so before we got together. I wasn't sure, but he definitely grew on me and I now find him incredibly sexy, and I love him like crazy. We've been together over a year. I think 6 months is good advice to see how you're feeling. Good luck!

I only clicked on to find out about his tiny penis.

Anyway, of he makes you smile, keep going. Worse case scenario you get smoggy and gropey and think no, not working for me, or have sex and think afterwards well that was FINE

Stick with him. Much better to have a lovely man than sexual fireworks with as asshole. I sure he is a grower

How is the kissing?

I was in a similar position a few months ago. Now we're an item, I love him, we can't keep our hands off each other.

I met someone late last summer, wasn't sure I even fancied him or that I could get past a few things that were putting me off.

There was a lightbulb moment a couple of months ago where he was cooking me dinner when i realised I was totally in love with him and haven't been able to take my hands off him since!

I always found the relationships with sparks are the ones that end badly for me!

Thank you all again..
Kissing was good

He is so completely my type on paper 🤣 so I honestly think it's me holding back through fear.. I don't date, in 9 years I've had a brief relationship with someone I'd known for years & totally idolised & 2 dates with one other before this man so I guess I just wanted the fairytale. I'm optimistic it still can be.. I keep looking over his fb photos & think yeah I do fancy him.. the current CV situation doesn't help new relationships either but we've spoken about a weekend away as soon as allowed which I'm sure will help me know once & for all.

Thing is the fairytale of love at first sight, there's a reason you never see the follow up.

Cinderella and Charming? Turns out that X Box she brought him for Xmas is his new best friend and he's always at too critical a point to change a nappy.

Rapunzel and Flynn? Went back to petty crime

Sleeping Beauty's DH, got a sex kink where he likes her to pretend to be asleep.

Snow White? She moved back and had a baby with Doc

Beauty? She left Beast for a hairy biker who doesn't shave.

@SleepingStandingUp

Thing is the fairytale of love at first sight, there's a reason you never see the follow up.

Cinderella and Charming? Turns out that X Box she brought him for Xmas is his new best friend and he's always at too critical a point to change a nappy.

Rapunzel and Flynn? Went back to petty crime

Sleeping Beauty's DH, got a sex kink where he likes her to pretend to be asleep.

Snow White? She moved back and had a baby with Doc

Beauty? She left Beast for a hairy biker who doesn't shave.

Howling at this....thank you. OP just see how it goes. Step out the way of yourself for a while and let yourself relax a bit.

@SleepingStandingUp

Love this.. you are so right!

At 46 I should know better.. will appreciate him for the kindness he's already shown in just a few weeks.. with how internet dating is I'm thankful that he so far seems genuine, decent, attentive & not showered me with dick pics 🤣🤣🤣

I read that as showered you with dock pics. I was about to come over all prissy and say that's what caused problems with Snow White's ex Prince Florian after they split.... Moana's Dad was not happy....

Exactly, your a proper grownup. You don't need Florian and his dick pics and his bitterness over his ex - "and the bitch looks at me and says - size isn't everything Florian, he reaches places you're too lazy to bend for!". You need the woodcutter who defied the Queen to save a girls life, who'll carve you a heart into the tree and have rampant sex with you on the log pile. When the time is right

This is excellent. Don't over think it. Just enjoy what it is an go with the flow. I think we get so used to the drama and uncertainty that we miss it when someone good is interested!