He's just dumped me for his ex....

[doeshelovemeofcoursenot]

May 2019 i started seeing him.
He has been single only 6 weeks from his ex.
He was with her 2 years and then before that they were together 4 years with a 3 year break.
They had a pretty messed up relationship he said (arguments ,police ,lies etc )
Anyway we got together but he still would talk about her occasionally.
When drunk tell me stories about how she treated him like rubbish then stories about lies she told.
Then he asked did I ever look up ex's?then showed me her Facebook profile
Anyway ..the last two weeks he was distant and I haven't seen him.
He didn't text yesterday at all or reply to mine /answer phone.
So I text today asking what was wrong ..
He replied
"I'm back with (her) please there is no real need for you to have any further contact with me.
I said what ??
He responded "leave me alone now yeah,no good can come from you going off it"
That's it ..
Wtf

That sounds absolutely awful, can’t imagine how you must be feeling.

But please, do not text him again! Leave with dignity. As the previous people have said, block him. He will come crawling back when it INEVITABLY goes wrong with her as the first two times clearly didn’t work. You are worth so much more than to be a bloody doormat to this joke of a man.

Never ever text again

Don't blame yourself. He would have liked you to a certain extent to stay as long as he did. But he is in a deeply toxic, codependent relationship with his ex, and that has made him selfish and stupid. Don't downplay what you had, but not every relationship is meant to least forever. Doesn't make it meaningless though. He's just not the right man for you.

He has done you a favour actually by being so brutal about the break up. Not giving you false hope or messing you about any longer, or cheating. But now you must delete and block, for your own sake. There's nothing else left there. Next!

Honestly block and delete his number and thank him for walking away now so you can meet someone that deserves you x

Honestly don't feel stupid. My ex went back to his ex girlfriend of 20 years ago. We were together for 14!!

You are well rid, block him and don't look back x

If he's relationship with her was so bad like he said he surely wouldn't have went back ?

He is most likely his ex's back up but he is in love with her. I imagine she always breaks up and he will always go back.

Leave him to it, as everyone has said go completely no contact you are well rid of that toxicity.

It’s a toxic relationship and they are trauma bonded. I know this is hard to do but try and not question anything about what he has done. You will really look back on this as the great escape. This is nothing to do with how great you are. This is all to do with his toxic relationship with her. He will constantly repeat this behaviour with other unsuspecting women.

Save your own number in your phone and text that instead when you feel the need to. This will end in tears (his!) and he will come crawling back. Make it your mission to not want him back by that time.

DO NOT REPLY

Look up a thread on here called dumped by text.

He will hound you but you'll gain nothing from replying. Your silence is your dignity.

Move upwards and never look back

Don’t message again. Work out what your plan is when he comes crawling back. He’s disgusting and he’s used you

If you're tempted to text again, picture him showing your message to her and the two of them laughing about it together. That should put you off contacting him.

He is a wanker of the highest order. Try to accept that you will never get what you want from him - closure, peace, apologies, kindness. You'll get none of that.

Be kind to yourself and do whatever it takes to move on.

Darling closure is something you give yourself

and it comes when you have had enough of being fucked about with.

This happened to a friend of mine, same way with the disappearing act. She was devastated but some way down the line, he showed up again in a public place and begged her to take him back. Fortunately by then she'd recovered and told him where to shove it. That's what you're aiming for.

How awful. You deserve much, much better.

I’m so sorry you’ve been treated like this x

I'm so sorry, doesheloveme, but you have had a lucky escape. The way he told you was callous in the extreme. Pity the woman with whom he has resumed a relationship!

When lockdown is over and you are out and about again, you'll meet other men who are more worthy of you.

Don't give him the time of day and live you're best life. He'll get burnt again just wait and watch. Better than that move on at least you've decluttered the crap from you're life.

He's done you a favour. They deserve each other and you are well rid.

No sorry, no explanation, and then that? Don't reply, don't lower yourself. Theirs hardly sounds like the romance of the century - I doubt it will end well.

I actually would reply and tell him what a nasty, cowardly turd he was for behaving that way, but each to their own. Probably not at 2.30 in the morning though.

I would not reply or get in touch. Do not lower yourself OP

Block him. He sounds like a complete dick.Hard as it seems- he’s just been using you. Sorry xx

Hi Op
You are way too good for the likes of him...

You can do hell of a lot better than that Arsehole😬

Very lucky escape op

If his relationship with his Ex was as bad as he says, he unfortunately will be back. Don’t wait around for ‘closure’, grieve what you thought you had and accept that ignoring the red flags is never a good idea.